Dealing with addiction

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pharmakos

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But as I found out during a previous taper, even 0.25mg is a monster-mother fucker to get off of. The mind racing and thinking and fixating on things that don't matter is fucking intense. Its really a holy fuck religious experience of retardation.

would it have been possible to go to 0.125mg after 0.25?
 

Whidon

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just got another Blister pack of Etzolam 2's in the mail today. it took a few extra days so the guy threw in an extra pack of etiz 1's for the wait. Basically an extra 50% for my order.


Even when i stop taking them My sleep is much easier for a while and takes weeks to get back to it's normal shittyness.

IDK, i must be very lucky. it's been a while since i took anything like dependence levels of benzos. This is the quickest turn around in years for me and i still took none for like 3 weeks. I'll take these over a week or two then likely wait till November.

But based on my experience i seem to be one of those lucky people who do not experience benzo withdrawals. i hear it's like 33%? I had a doc prescribe me up to 4mg a day of kpins for a year. i just stopped taking them when he got his license stripped and never had any issue. Nor have i had an issue any of the other two times i stopped taking my scripts of 1-2mg kpins or Xanax a day in the past. I never really took etiz enough to have those dependence levels as i would always spread out my buys and it's only got harder and harder to buy off the regular web over the pst 3-4 years.

A good thing as i really just love taking Etiz then playing video games. Or maybe watch Mad Men today. Extasy might be the greatest feeling in the world, for me but it's too intense with a powerful comedown so i haven't taken it since i was in my early 20's. But the whole Benzos + food + Video games is just magic in it's own way.

Any one live int eh UK have any idea if i can buy etiz there? i know it's illegal. Are a Script for benzo's difficult to accquire? I am going there to live with my GF and her family in early 2020.
 

pharmakos

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etizolam has a super long half life compared to other benzos, right? that's probably why you don't notice as much of an issue when you quit taking them, especially since it sounds like you never really escalate your dose as extremely as many do
 

Vanessa

Uncle Tanya
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So I'm a member of a private group on Facebook that involves my job. It's a very large group and we usually just shitpost memes about the job. One of our employees on Sunday decided to livestream his vodka induced meltdown that involved (I shit you not) Greta Thunberg, Donald Trump and Penguins. He was very left-leaning in his rantings. The entire stream was about 2 hours and 20 minutes long and went from awkwardly funny to the saddest pile of a mess of a human being. It wasn't JUST a guy getting drunk though and ranting; unless you saw the video you wouldn't understand... it was a clear cry for help. People in the stream called the cops and they showed up while the guy was on the floor. People literally thought he was dead. Dude posted last night saying that he was in detox for like 14 hours in the hospital and that he will never drink again.

It was just a stark reminder to a lot of us that witnessed this that alcohol is still a vicious fucking drug, regardless of its legality and ease of access to it.
 
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Alex

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Alcohol is so good they can't make it illegal. When it was illegal, it practically caused open warfare on the streets in major cities for who controlled it.

I've done a number of drugs in my day and nothing fucks me up more than booze.
 
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Kithani

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Alcohol is so good they can't make it illegal. When it was illegal, it practically caused open warfare on the streets in major cities for who controlled it.

I've done a number of drugs in my day and nothing fucks me up more than booze.

 

Kuriin

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I grew up in an very strong anti-marijuana community so benzos were really my only option for insomnia at the time.

Other options for it hadn't presented, or were unacceptable due to unwanted side effects I.E. Remeron. and other atypical SSRI classes.

I think lifestyle wise taking the benzo despite the atrocious withdrawal was the better beat over some of the other options.

Long term benzo use has been clinically shown to cause early dementia. Dementia is one helluva insidious disease. I try to tell my patients to smoke pot instead of benzos as patient-centered I can without getting drug tested, rofl.
 

Whidon

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Alcohol is so good they can't make it illegal. When it was illegal, it practically caused open warfare on the streets in major cities for who controlled it.

I've done a number of drugs in my day and nothing fucks me up more than booze.

Does anyone else have reactions to alcohol like this? Darker alcohol is always worse but all alcohol has these same negative effects on me

I actually find alcohol unbearably disgusting. If i do drink it makes me sick well before i can get drunk. I had a longtime girlfriend who was exactly the same way. I wonder if it's an allergy or something?
But to me alcohol is just revolting both interms of taste and effects. I can drink basically one beer, anything more, or another harder, even wine is just beyond the pale for me. My face turns red, then purple. Then i start to sweet, feel dehydrated, get a headache, stomach issues and sensitivity to light ect.. I think i managed to drink more then the equivalent of 2-3 shots maybe twice in my life and it was so miserable i've drank like 4-5 beers total alcohol consumption since turning 20 despite working in the Wine industry and around drinkers all the time.

It's probably a good thing i am this way given my like of benzo's. If alcohol did the same thing as a good benzo with no near term side effects i would Prob have trouble not getting addicted. it's easy enough for me to just buy 20-60mg etizolam every few months. But if Alcohol was like liquid etiz, and i think chemically the effects are supposed to be similar. Well, i might well be some major addict.
 

Whidon

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Long term benzo use has been clinically shown to cause early dementia. Dementia is one helluva insidious disease. I try to tell my patients to smoke pot instead of benzos as patient-centered I can without getting drug tested, rofl.

Pot's another thing i find disgusting and just makes me stupid and feel unpleasant, anxious, and even depressed. Once again the same girl i mentioned also had the same reactions to alcohol as me had this dislike and reaction of weed also. Of course we had a degree of Animus I've never seen two humans with anything even close to that before but these are physiological things not mental.s

I also feel i am more inebriated with even a little bit of weed then i am taking a largish dose of Xanax or Etiz. Like i just took 2mg etiz along with my pain meds i take for nerve pain. I am doing great on overwatch, but would suck if i did pot.

Maybe it's because i don't do benzo's often enough but my memory has always been fantastic. The only negative from benzo's ive seen is at times you can be super fucked up and not realize it at all. But this has happened to me like 2-3 times ever. First time it cost me having sex with my on again-off again girl one night. Since then I've only taken Benzo's in private. So the other situation just created a word salad reddit post.

I guess it must really be some people just get tottally different effects from weed. Because i think it's a tottally shit drug. Alcohol is the only one I'd say is worse. So if Pot really doesn't make you fucked up and helps with Anxiety thats great. But for many of us i think benzo's are the only viable route.
 

Alex

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You sound rather unique. I don't think there are "many" of you. Weed is hella popular across all demographics.
 

alavaz

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Alcohol was great until I got into my 30s. It's still great to be drunk, but the acid reflux, terrible sleep and headaches I almost always get now mean that I don't drink much.

I always hated weed too. Even the supposed "body" high stuff still feels super psychedelic to me. I can't do anything but watch TV and wish I wouldn't be so high whenever I've used weed.
 
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Punko

Macho Ma'am
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I always hated weed too. Even the supposed "body" high stuff still feels super psychedelic to me. I can't do anything but watch TV and wish I wouldn't be so high whenever I've used weed.

If you think you are going to feel bad when high, you are going to feel bad when high.
 

alavaz

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If you think you are going to feel bad when high, you are going to feel bad when high.
I mean maybe now. In the past I went into it with great optimism that it would be what my friends describe and it's always been the same. I'm more than happy just not using weed though, so no real issue.
 

Whidon

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So i got the desire to buy some etiz for the Holiday recently. Sadly my old reliable Domestic tiz site has been OOS for the past few eeks and no clue if/when it's coming back. So i bit the bullet and did two thigns. Ordered from a reputable Foreign site 200 1mg etizest pills. Figure that will be like 3-4 of my normal 40-60mg "bringes" and should last 6 months.

Also, since thats gonna not comie in till after Thanksgiving most likely i found wo other RC Benzo's online sold at an american site that sells mostly HGH and other semi-steriody stuff. For some reason I've noticed RC Benzo's and HGH/roid stuff often appears to have a good deal of overlap in customer base. Anyone have a clue why?

Anyways so i got some Diclazepam in a couple days ago and it's OK. I would rate above the crap tier of Lorazepam and around Diazepam. Very little sedation, strong anti-anxiety, last very long. Overall this looks like a god send for Benzo addicts and drunks to keep the WD's away as it's cheap. otherwise a very functional benzo that i think if a pharma company decided to sell they could make alot of cash, Despite not making me tired i feel asleep super easy last two nights and slept the whole night so it has that also. Not Hypnotic either, just anti-anxiety that makes it easy to sleep basically. I even took 4mg Diclaz with some Morphine i have lying around since my knee injury. it did potentate both but it was not nearly as good as your normal benzo+opiate godliness.

Got a small 15mg bottle of Clonazolam coming in the next cpl days. I've heard all the horror stories but it's a small total amount and i tend to know how to dose these. I am very curious to see it's recreational effects. Some people rate this higher then Etiz
 

Alex

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That's like reading another language. Only prescription drug I've ever used is adderall.
 

Borzak

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Any advice on alcohol? A distant friend has asked me help point them in the right directin. I know nothing about it in the least. I don't drink. Never known anyone with an issue. At least for right now going someplace for help would be off the table. I guess one good thing is they know they have a problem and are looking for "something" instead of just hiding it. She just got out of a marriage that turned physical and violent and I'm guessing that didn't help so hopefully at least part of the reason is reduced. I think she mentioned to me maybe is cause I live 1,000 miles away from her and know her kinda well but we're not in the same circle of friends in the least. I'm not looking to personally save her.
 

Guurn

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What state and will she actually get help or don't you know. Not judging, just need more context if advice could be useful. Alcohol is the hardest addiction for most people IMO but some states have significantly better resources than others.
 

Borzak

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Florida. I do not know if she would go out and get help or not to be honest. She's in a bad situation which most probably is not helping. She is married and has two kids and the youngest reaching 18. In with a family business.

Just was wondering if there was anywhere else I could point her. I think she would likely go out and get help if the virus died down some. I think she has a short time to go till the youngest reaches 18. Family is 1,000 miles away.

I also mentioned to her that she might and most likely be depressed. I told her I am no expert. She said she went to a therapist and talked to a few friends and I was the first person to mention that. Kind of blew my mind. She's totally shut down never leaving the house now other than to be out and about on the property.
 

Cad

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Florida. I do not know if she would go out and get help or not to be honest. She's in a bad situation which most probably is not helping. She is married and has two kids and the youngest reaching 18. In with a family business.

Just was wondering if there was anywhere else I could point her. I think she would likely go out and get help if the virus died down some. I think she has a short time to go till the youngest reaches 18. Family is 1,000 miles away.

I also mentioned to her that she might and most likely be depressed. I told her I am no expert. She said she went to a therapist and talked to a few friends and I was the first person to mention that. Kind of blew my mind. She's totally shut down never leaving the house now other than to be out and about on the property.

Alcohol is a tough one for some people because it's perfectly legal and socially acceptable to get sauced regularly so in the normal course of a social life you will be around people drinking constantly.

Not so for coke/heroin/etc... a lot easier to stay away from. Alcohol is literally everywhere.
 
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