Generalized family drama

Cukernaut

Sharpie Markers Aren't Pens
<Gold Donor>
1,712
2,615
When parents die a lot of people are the age where they're realizing that they should have been saving for retirement all of their lives and now they're 62 and have $1200 in their savings account and they're shitting their pants. Mom's house starts to sound like a nice solution at that point but holy shit does it get ugly sometimes.

I am trying to change my life perspective on the concept of "retirement". I plan to die one day keeling over my keyboard working. Better than the alternatives. I have seen it all in our family.
 
  • 2Like
Reactions: 1 users

Lanx

<Prior Amod>
60,592
132,613
question for anyone.
would you play $1000 to bury (cremate) a relative, while not a good person, never did anything personally to you, or let them have a pauper's burial?
note
i'd like to clarify i'm sure he means $1000 just to have an individual cremation

sort of like how when your dog dies you can pay for an individual cremation or a group cremation

this is just putting the corpse in a cardboard box (all cremations need to be enclosed) and turning on the flame, there are no funeral services held nor ashes given (i assume)

funeral services w/ cremation start at like a few grand 5k or so
 

TJT

Mr. Poopybutthole
<Gold Donor>
40,923
102,711
I am trying to change my life perspective on the concept of "retirement". I plan to die one day keeling over my keyboard working. Better than the alternatives. I have seen it all in our family.
Pretty much. I intend to keep active at least a little for as long as I conceivably can.

The bloodthirst families get over money when someone dies truly disgusts me. If my own family ever comes to that I am cutting all of them off for good. I want no part in it.
 

Adebisi

Clump of Cells
<Silver Donator>
27,674
32,714
I'm insanely good at cutting out shitty people real quick, or at least not indulging their shittiness.

I think I'm autistic in that way.
 
  • 4Like
Reactions: 3 users

Goatface

Avatar of War Slayer
9,276
14,344
this is just putting the corpse in a cardboard box (all cremations need to be enclosed) and turning on the flame, there are no funeral services held nor ashes given (i assume)

funeral services w/ cremation start at like a few grand 5k or so
it was a quote for direct cremation with ashes. paperwork was like $500 and the container was $150 for "basic box". locally have a place that has packages that start at like $700 with an urn and a few hours in their smaller rooms for like 20-30 people. (no body at the service just an urn)
 

BrutulTM

Good, bad, I'm the guy with the gun.
<Silver Donator>
14,430
2,213
I am trying to change my life perspective on the concept of "retirement". I plan to die one day keeling over my keyboard working. Better than the alternatives. I have seen it all in our family.

I'm with you 100%. I've seen so many people who couldn't wait to retire like it was going to be the best thing ever and then 2-5 years later they're bored of all of their hobbies and fucking depressed sitting in front of the TV all day and they do that for a few years and then die of having a pointless life. Not interested.
 
  • 1Like
Reactions: 1 user

Hateyou

Not Great, Not Terrible
<Bronze Donator>
16,286
42,307
question for anyone.
would you play $1000 to bury (cremate) a relative, while not a good person, never did anything personally to you, or let them have a pauper's burial?
Not randomly no. If it was going to cause grief for family I did care about then maybe. I don’t feel obligated to pay for things for random family members.
 

moonarchia

The Scientific Shitlord
21,359
38,811
I am trying to change my life perspective on the concept of "retirement". I plan to die one day keeling over my keyboard working. Better than the alternatives. I have seen it all in our family.
It depends on whether you need that social/routine outlet or not. If I had enough to retire on I would start taking up martial arts classes (for health and utility, not into actual fighting or machismo) and go back to school until I die. There are literally dozens of BA/BS degrees and classes I would love to take. Would probably start with the free stuff MIT offers, and go from there.
 

BrutulTM

Good, bad, I'm the guy with the gun.
<Silver Donator>
14,430
2,213
It depends on whether you need that social/routine outlet or not. If I had enough to retire on I would start taking up martial arts classes (for health and utility, not into actual fighting or machismo) and go back to school until I die. There are literally dozens of BA/BS degrees and classes I would love to take. Would probably start with the free stuff MIT offers, and go from there.
You would do that just so when the worms eat your brain there will be some more knowledge in it? If you're never going to put it to any use you might as well be watching porn or the price is right or some shit. I don't think it's about socializing or having a routine. It's about doing something that matters to other people. Pursuing pleasure of whatever type will only take you so far.
 
  • 1Picard
Reactions: 1 user

moonarchia

The Scientific Shitlord
21,359
38,811
You would do that just so when the worms eat your brain there will be some more knowledge in it? If you're never going to put it to any use you might as well be watching porn or the price is right or some shit. I don't think it's about socializing or having a routine. It's about doing something that matters to other people. Pursuing pleasure of whatever type will only take you so far.
Nothing you do matters in the end. Not a single fucking thing. Enjoy the time you have. Try to help the people you care about do the same. I enjoy learning things, sometimes those things end up useful later on.
 
  • 3Like
Reactions: 2 users

Fucker

Log Wizard
11,545
26,090
You would do that just so when the worms eat your brain there will be some more knowledge in it? If you're never going to put it to any use you might as well be watching porn or the price is right or some shit. I don't think it's about socializing or having a routine. It's about doing something that matters to other people. Pursuing pleasure of whatever type will only take you so far.
Why not? It's something to do. Keeps the mind active, which is important. I knew a guy who retired at 65 and went and got a degree in math. Why? Why not. Active minds tend to be healthy minds. Keeping a routine going is also good, especially for someone who had one their entire lives.
 

BrutulTM

Good, bad, I'm the guy with the gun.
<Silver Donator>
14,430
2,213
What I mean is that it won't be meaningful to you unless you're doing something that matters to other people. People need to be of some use. Dedicating your life to your own pleasure sounds nice but it's just jacking off and it wears thin pretty quickly.
 
  • 1Like
Reactions: 1 user

Cad

<Bronze Donator>
24,487
45,378
What I mean is that it won't be meaningful to you unless you're doing something that matters to other people. People need to be of some use. Dedicating your life to your own pleasure sounds nice but it's just jacking off and it wears thin pretty quickly.
There's a lot of things you can do to keep yourself useful and active if you want to that have nothing to do with jobs or money. It just depends on the type of person, their personality and motivations. The type of person that will just watch TV and waste away never had any ambition or aspirations anyway, or they'd be doing them. They're just marking time at their job or whatever so they can watch TV in their free time, which is limited because they have a job. Retirement isn't the problem, retirement just exposed the problem - they're a boring fuckwit.
 
  • 2Like
Reactions: 1 users

Captain Suave

Caesar si viveret, ad remum dareris.
4,761
8,026
What I mean is that it won't be meaningful to you unless you're doing something that matters to other people.

This is hardly true. The vast, VAST majority of humanity has no idea I exist, never mind gives a shit about what I do with myself. I'm perfectly comfortable doing things that are of interest only to me. I'd bet that almost all of art, craft, and science is done by people satisfying their own curiosity, and those outcomes which become notable are are just the outliers and would have been created anyway if they'd never received attention.
 
Last edited:

moonarchia

The Scientific Shitlord
21,359
38,811
What I mean is that it won't be meaningful to you unless you're doing something that matters to other people. People need to be of some use. Dedicating your life to your own pleasure sounds nice but it's just jacking off and it wears thin pretty quickly.
That is only true if you base your self worth on others. I don't have any fucks to give about what others think of me beyond what they are willing to pay me to work for them. There are exactly 3 people who I care about enough to want to help out if I can. My parents, who are in their 70s, and my sister. Her son may be worth investing in eventually, but too young to know yet.
 

BrutulTM

Good, bad, I'm the guy with the gun.
<Silver Donator>
14,430
2,213
There's a lot of things you can do to keep yourself useful and active if you want to that have nothing to do with jobs or money. It just depends on the type of person, their personality and motivations. The type of person that will just watch TV and waste away never had any ambition or aspirations anyway, or they'd be doing them. They're just marking time at their job or whatever so they can watch TV in their free time, which is limited because they have a job. Retirement isn't the problem, retirement just exposed the problem - they're a boring fuckwit.

There's right ways to do retirement for sure. I know people who retired and then became president of the local food bank. or ran for the state legislature, or started volunteering regularly at their church etc. Some even got a new job that they weren't burned out on like their old one. All that is good. I'm not saying you need to stay in your current career until you die, but if your vision of retirement is you sitting in a beach chair sipping a frozen margarita that's a nice Sunday afternoon not a way to spend the last 25 years of your life. You need a reason to get out of bed every morning that's not just hedonistic and things like fishing or golf aren't going to cut it. My grandfather was a passionate fisherman. Every vacation he ever took in his life was fishing. When he retired he took his fully restored '56 GMC with a Cummins diesel that he put in it himself, hitched it to a 5th wheel camper and a boat and hit the road and fished his ass off for about 5 years. The last 15 years of his life he didn't fish at all. At the end he just sat around listening to audio books and playing solitaire and never seeing anyone because he had alienated everyone who cared about him by being a miserable prick. He's not the only person I've seen do this. Make a change at 65 if you want, but most people have a lot of life left at that point and "relaxing" is not a life.
 

Captain Suave

Caesar si viveret, ad remum dareris.
4,761
8,026
Some even got a new job that they weren't burned out on like their old one... You need a reason to get out of bed every morning that's not just hedonistic

I remember reading some study on retirees that found the happiest and most long-lived actually worked MORE in "retirement" than they did before, but it was for (mostly) non-financial reasons or mix of reasons that they gave a shit about, so it wasn't onerous. It's about financial freedom, not just leisure. (Although leisure is important, too.)
 
  • 1Like
Reactions: 1 user

moonarchia

The Scientific Shitlord
21,359
38,811
I remember reading some study on retirees that found the happiest and most long-lived actually worked MORE in "retirement" than they did before, but it was for (mostly) non-financial reasons or mix of reasons that they gave a shit about, so it wasn't onerous. It's about financial freedom, not just leisure. (Although leisure is important, too.)
Hence why I would go back to school forever. It's a lot of hard work to truly learn a discipline like math or applied physics, but it would be work I enjoyed.
 
  • 1Like
Reactions: 1 user