Generalized family drama

moonarchia

The Scientific Shitlord
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just don't be that guy that is 70 living in a dorm :D
Fuck you, man! Dorm life is sweet as hell. As long as you have a room to yourself anyways.

Edit: Holy fucking shit I just realized time is a flat circle. Last time I was living in the dorms was when the Centennial school thing went down. I was playing EQ like a pro. And right now I am playing EQ like a n00b.
 

Ossoi

Tranny Chaser
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I don't speak to my dad or sister and would no contact my mother if she was still alive.

Family or not, toxic relationships and people are still toxic

Found out earlier via my stepdad that my dad was found dead in his bed. Sister got him to tell me because I don't want any contact with her

Phoned my half sister, first time I've spoke to her since she was a kid. She's 34 now I think, I don't even know

Was worried I'd have to arrange his funeral etc, even though he was never around for me as a kid. And because he fucked up our relationship as adults massively twice.

Apparently his brother is back from China or wherever the hell he went traveling to in the 80s. So I guess him and my half sister will do it

Not even sure I want to go to funeral for a guy I barely knew and who made no attempt to apologise (which was really all I was waiting for maybe)

I got some texts off an unknown number a few months ago, offering me football tickets, I assumed it was him so I ignored it. Same number then sent me photos at Glastonbury (like Coachella) also ignored it.

Also don't want to go funeral to see a load of people I don't know and havent seen since I was a child, family or not. Also don't want to see my full sister who I've not spoken to for 15 years

It was weird timing though. Just last month I messaged an old university tutor about the archive of BBC tapes he was managing. These were "YouTube before YouTube" - random people around the uk shooting very short segments as a large scale documentary series. My dad had contributed to these, so I asked the tutor what he was doing with them

Also found my dad's YouTube channel, he came across as an embarrassment. Auditioning for Britain's got talent with shitty stand-up, getting into fights with neighbours etc

I honestly think he was always chasing some big short cut to money. I remember him trying to latch onto some asbestos lawsuit when I was younger.

He was also featured in a newspaper article which made me think he was living out of a campervan. My half sister says he lived in a house, no idea how much it was worth but any inheritance will be more than what he contributed to my upbringing (allegedly according to my mother but she wasn't exactly mentally stable)

My half sister said he was probably dead a while before anyone checked on him, and lived a lonely life because she'd moved to London. I dunno, the signal kept breaking up so we didn't speak that long
 

Lanx

Oye Ve
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Found out earlier via my stepdad that my dad was found dead in his bed. Sister got him to tell me because I don't want any contact with her

Phoned my half sister, first time I've spoke to her since she was a kid. She's 34 now I think, I don't even know

Was worried I'd have to arrange his funeral etc, even though he was never around for me as a kid. And because he fucked up our relationship as adults massively twice.

Apparently his brother is back from China or wherever the hell he went traveling to in the 80s. So I guess him and my half sister will do it

Not even sure I want to go to funeral for a guy I barely knew and who made no attempt to apologise (which was really all I was waiting for maybe)

I got some texts off an unknown number a few months ago, offering me football tickets, I assumed it was him so I ignored it. Same number then sent me photos at Glastonbury (like Coachella) also ignored it.

Also don't want to go funeral to see a load of people I don't know and havent seen since I was a child, family or not. Also don't want to see my full sister who I've not spoken to for 15 years

It was weird timing though. Just last month I messaged an old university tutor about the archive of BBC tapes he was managing. These were "YouTube before YouTube" - random people around the uk shooting very short segments as a large scale documentary series. My dad had contributed to these, so I asked the tutor what he was doing with them

Also found my dad's YouTube channel, he came across as an embarrassment. Auditioning for Britain's got talent with shitty stand-up, getting into fights with neighbours etc

I honestly think he was always chasing some big short cut to money. I remember him trying to latch onto some asbestos lawsuit when I was younger.

He was also featured in a newspaper article which made me think he was living out of a campervan. My half sister says he lived in a house, no idea how much it was worth but any inheritance will be more than what he contributed to my upbringing (allegedly according to my mother but she wasn't exactly mentally stable)

My half sister said he was probably dead a while before anyone checked on him, and lived a lonely life because she'd moved to London. I dunno, the signal kept breaking up so we didn't speak that long
is it gonna be a chinese funeral? depending on how chinese you are, you kinda have to be there as the eldest male, unless you don't care about him losing all face.
 

Ossoi

Tranny Chaser
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is it gonna be a chinese funeral?

I doubt it. Although tbh I have no idea. Yes, my father was born in and grew up in Liverpool Chinatown, but apparently his mother was like half Chinese, or 3/4 (I have no idea, he wasn't in my life much so I am only going on what I heard as a kid, and even some of those details passed down via my mother turned out not to be the whole story) - so he wasn't considered full Chinese and accepted by the rest of the community. He didn't speak Chinese.

My grandfather was one of the Chinese seamen who worked in British merchant navy during WW2, was a POW twice, had a wife and daughter in Liverpool. Then him and a load of other Chinese seamen got deported back to China/Hong Kong after WW2, leaving behind their families. Fortunately for me, somehow he made it back under a different name. He wanted to be buried under his own name, so had a Chinese gravestone made long before he died. My father was born a few years after my grandfather made it back

Even if it is a Chinese funeral - if I didn't have any contact with him, don't want to help arrange the funeral etc. Why would I care about him losing face now that he's dead? How much face do you think he lost by me cutting contact with him for the last 15 years of his life?
 
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Lanx

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I doubt it. Although tbh I have no idea. Yes, my father was born in and grew up in Liverpool Chinatown, but apparently his mother was like half Chinese, or 3/4 (I have no idea, he wasn't in my life much so I am only going on what I heard as a kid, and even some of those details passed down via my mother turned out not to be the whole story) - so he wasn't considered full Chinese and accepted by the rest of the community. He didn't speak Chinese.

My grandfather was one of the Chinese seamen who worked in British merchant navy during WW2, was a POW twice, had a wife and daughter in Liverpool. Then him and a load of other Chinese seamen got deported back to China/Hong Kong after WW2, leaving behind their families. Fortunately for me, somehow he made it back under a different name. He wanted to be buried under his own name, so had a Chinese gravestone made long before he died. My father was born a few years after my grandfather made it back

Even if it is a Chinese funeral - if I didn't have any contact with him, don't want to help arrange the funeral etc. Why would I care about him losing face now that he's dead? How much face do you think he lost by me cutting contact with him for the last 15 years of his life?
youre his son, he can't lose any amount of face w/ you

if you don't care, then treat this as an annoying high school reunion and throw the flyer in the trash and don't give it a single thought
 

Ossoi

Tranny Chaser
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Holding grudges for 15 years is worse than any family drama. Let that shit go.

funny you say that because I just came here to write this up

I've been speaking to my half sister who I haven't seen since she was a child and had no contact with. She added me on FB twice after my mother died in 07 and after I had fallen out with my father. I rejected it twice because I was so angry at him I didn't want him looking at her FB or asking "what's Ossoi Ossoi upto"

Anyway, we've been whatsapping back and forth for 2 hours about my dad and my sister. Her experiences with both of them mirror my own EXACTLY. She also cut my sister off for being a constant source of drama. Said my sister is a narcissist. I explained that I saw too much of my mother in my sister (narcissism). Sadly, half sister says she has inherited some more of my mothers traits like hyperchondria and munchausens by proxy - always saying her daughter is sick etc. Apparently my sister has homeschooled her kid, the dad isn't in the kids life at all. Just a complete basket case.

We have both cut her off despite having a niece because we don't want to form an emotional bond with the kid that keeps us having to deal with our sisters nonsense.

As for our father, she also fell out with him but didn't go no contact. Again - I'm telling her "this is what happened" and she is saying EXACTLY that is typical of him.

So actually, I don't feel any guilt at all about my decisions over the last 15 years.


Edit: my dad had the same username for his tripadvisor and ebay account lol. I knew he had a "Trump NOPE" t-shirt in the style of Obama Hope. But in one of his tripadvisor pics he's wearing a Lincoln Project shirt. I knew he was left leaning, but how the fuck a Chinese dude from Liverpool has even heard of Lincoln Project let alone acquires their merch is beyond me
 
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Lanx

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Edit: my dad had the same username for his tripadvisor and ebay account lol. I knew he had a "Trump NOPE" t-shirt in the style of Obama Hope. But in one of his tripadvisor pics he's wearing a Lincoln Project shirt. I knew he was left leaning, but how the fuck a Chinese dude from Liverpool has even heard of Lincoln Project let alone acquires their merch is beyond me
oh fuck that faggot, he deserves no face
 
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Ossoi

Tranny Chaser
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oh fuck that faggot, he deserves no face

yeah, it would be funny to debate politics with him. One of his reviews is him complaining about "wokism" for getting "cancelled" because he got banned after leaving a negative review of a restaurants chips lol.

Also, his brother got deported from China for selling counterfeit stuff, lol
 
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