Final Update:Broke up. Not only did she go, but she"s still there right now.
This is so difficult. I don"t even know how to break up with someone.
This is so difficult. I don"t even know how to break up with someone.
Girls who broke your heart thread
- Thread starter Aychamo BanBan
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just try to stay away from her from now, don"t try to think about her. don"t try to keep up to date on what shes doing, don"t visit her facebook page etc.
keep yourself busy, get stuff done that you need to do, go out alot, meet friends and other girls
keep yourself busy, get stuff done that you need to do, go out alot, meet friends and other girls
Good for you dude.STFU said:
You"re in a great position in your life right now - you"re young you"re in a new city you"ll get to meet new people - go out and have fun.
Don"t answer her calls/texts/emails/fb messages or w/e for at least a few weeks. You need to make a clean break and cutting contact is the only way to not wind up in the exact same spot.
Side note - nice to see someone ask for advice, not writhe around in denial and follow it/have a positive response here. Wish more folks on the thread were like you dude.
Tuco
I got Tuco'd!
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shit no wonder I couldn"t findFoghornDeadhorn said:
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I hope this doesn"t happen to stfu.
Just try and remember it"s not about you. Relationships from that age almost never work out. People change, people get the feeling they"re "missing something," and before even that, people choose to make relationships serious that never had the elements to be.STFU said:
She chose a very immature way to get out. Not your loss. Sucks for now, but you"ll get over it.
Lithose
Buzzfeed Editor
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Do not talk to her. Telling you this because she is most likely going to call you soon. Remember, going there was a means to an end for her. Not an end in and of itself. She still wants something from you, don"t give it to her. (Even if nothing "happened".)STFU said:
Also, we have all been where you are now. And most of us,ifwe were honest, would admit we have broken down in a moment of weakness and given into the crazy/needy bitch we have all had once in our lives (especiallyif sex was offered as a form of apology.). So, just try to be strong. If you fail, don"t let it start a cycle. (Because like I said, many of us have failed here before.) And remember, willpower is bolstered by..Fun, Friends and Fucking (Someone else).
You did the right thing, it"s going to be hard soon to keep believing that, but you did. Chances are high she"s going to pull some shenanigans to get you back, just ignore her. Don"t answer, delete her number, etc.STFU said:
Like Etoille said, it"s nice to see someone actually follow through with what they said they were going to do. Hopefully you"ll soon see that breaking up with her was the best thing for you.
Adebisi
Clump of Cells
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Ya dun goo"d. For quick reference, I break that scenario into two possible choices:
1. You trust her. You know she"s not going to bang this guy. You let her go with little or no afterthought.
2. You don"t trust her. You"re pretty sure she"s going to bang this guy. You dump her with little or no afterthought.
Either way you shouldn"t have to worry about the choice you"ve made. That"s called self confidence, which ladies love!
The following is not an option:
You don"t trust her. You"re pretty sure she"s going to bang this guy. You let her go, and you"re left to think about all the hot secks they might be having. You get to argue about this for weeks and months, emotionally draining you and making you more insecure in your next relationship.
1. You trust her. You know she"s not going to bang this guy. You let her go with little or no afterthought.
2. You don"t trust her. You"re pretty sure she"s going to bang this guy. You dump her with little or no afterthought.
Either way you shouldn"t have to worry about the choice you"ve made. That"s called self confidence, which ladies love!
The following is not an option:
You don"t trust her. You"re pretty sure she"s going to bang this guy. You let her go, and you"re left to think about all the hot secks they might be having. You get to argue about this for weeks and months, emotionally draining you and making you more insecure in your next relationship.
You tell her it"s over and be calm, don"t call names - NOTHING. Tell her you tried but don"t see a future with her. Tell her to discontinue all contact with you. Make it final, if you have anything of hers or she of yours, too bad. Get rid of it. You have zero reason to talk to her.
You will eventually go through a million phases so keep busy. Don"t call wanting a reason "Why" - The reason is she"s an immature, selfish, attention whoring cunt.
Don"t send passive aggressive guilt texts. Don"t cling on the fact she may have done this to get your attention (or think it"s because she loves you). She"s emotionally unstable, she"s not girlfriend material, and she will continuously put you through this. She wants your attention, not you.
Stay strong, if you feel like you HAVE to talk to her do this; write her a letter and never give it to her. It"s an easy way to dispose of the thoughts in your head and can ease the stress you"re having, too.
If your phone is capable of it, block her number to make things easier. Don"t call her friends either!
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Alright, step 1. When she calls you back (and she will) don"t answer...ever. Let it go to voice-mail or whatever for at least a week.STFU said:
Step 2. During that week you"re going to enlist the help of a female, either a replacement bitch or just a friend of yours that she is unfamiliar with. SHE is going to answer your phone, giggle, and act all bubbly and tell her that "You"re not here right now." and she"s going to hang up.
Step 3. You never talk to her again. The calls will stop in about 2 weeks, but then you have a 50/50 shot of her calling you again 2-6 months from now. IF you are over her (i.e. you are either in a steady, happy relationship or have had at least one since) THEN you can answer it, but limit yourself to 90 seconds of phone time TOPS. If you"re not over her, then just let it go to voice-mail.
Optional Step 4. If you"re over her when she calls you back, and she is willing to travel to you. feel free to get a quick guilt free fuck out of it and do all the fucked up shit you wanted to do with her that you never got a chance to do. If you did it all already...think of some more shit. Once this is done THEN, never speak with her again under any circumstances. Block her number, restraining order, whatever it takes.
Truly, and it"s not like he"s going to listen if the bitch changes her mind anyway.Sutekh said:
Here"s the totality of what needs to be said:
STFU, don"t engage her under any circumstances.
ToeMissile
Pronouns: zie/zhem/zer
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Like everyone else is saying, definitely this. I"m also not a fan of the whole having a female friend answer+giggle etc. There"s no need to stoop to her level or give her extra ammunition to talk shit about you. Just cut the chord, avoid thinking about all of this as much as possible. In a couple months you can look back with a much more subjective eye and see what there is to learn from the experiencePicasso said:
Just focus on your freedom, bro. You deserve it. You no longer have to worry about THAT whole aspect of life. FREEDOM!!!!!!
Lithose
Buzzfeed Editor
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Reading the responses is actually pretty amazing. The first thing everyone has said is "Don"t talk to her when she calls."....It"s fucking incredible that EVERYONE at one point in their life has been in "this" relationship.
Like I said though, STFU. I"m pretty sure if everyone rattled off their life story here, you would find most of us got to the point where you are and then proceeded to trip up a few times. Either by just talking to the girl, or by playing her fucking mind games (As Tuco said, don"t play her game. You won"t win against a woman. You will lose, badly. They are so much better at it than you that it is beyond your comprehension.)
The worst trip up is going to come if you"re ever in a situation alone with her again. Sex will come up, especially if it was good between the two of you. It will be hard to resist. So rather than trying to "make the right" choice, just avoid the situation all together. As others have said, don"t talk to her, don"t go where she is and don"t give her a way to find where you are.Ifshe gets you on the phone or gets you alone in person, you"ll be at a severe disadvantage and you *will* fuck up (Either by just arguing with her or by sleeping with her, at worst). Some guys on here like to say that they"ve always been "strong with the pimp hand"...But a girl that you havereallycared about will fuck your thinking up in no time, no matter how much you steel yourself. (Notice how everyone says avoid, avoid, avoid. They all know it.)
So just avoid her and good luck. This isn"t easy. Don"t let anyone tell you it will be.
Like I said though, STFU. I"m pretty sure if everyone rattled off their life story here, you would find most of us got to the point where you are and then proceeded to trip up a few times. Either by just talking to the girl, or by playing her fucking mind games (As Tuco said, don"t play her game. You won"t win against a woman. You will lose, badly. They are so much better at it than you that it is beyond your comprehension.)
The worst trip up is going to come if you"re ever in a situation alone with her again. Sex will come up, especially if it was good between the two of you. It will be hard to resist. So rather than trying to "make the right" choice, just avoid the situation all together. As others have said, don"t talk to her, don"t go where she is and don"t give her a way to find where you are.Ifshe gets you on the phone or gets you alone in person, you"ll be at a severe disadvantage and you *will* fuck up (Either by just arguing with her or by sleeping with her, at worst). Some guys on here like to say that they"ve always been "strong with the pimp hand"...But a girl that you havereallycared about will fuck your thinking up in no time, no matter how much you steel yourself. (Notice how everyone says avoid, avoid, avoid. They all know it.)
So just avoid her and good luck. This isn"t easy. Don"t let anyone tell you it will be.
STFU There is some good and bad that comes with breaking up.
The Bad= It does suck going through a break up. It can be hard.
The Good= Its a Vagina Party and your invited. Your single and young, go have fun bro!
With how you have described her you will have to be careful also. She is a attention whore. So since you have stopped giving her attention, she is going to be trying to get a hold of you, and i almost am positive she will try to get drilled by you again. When she tries this, do not fall for it. She is just trying to get your attention and get you back because you are actually ignoring her. So this will bring her back. Just as i said do not fall into that trap. It will seem fine for a little bit but in the end it will lead down to the same road you are at now.
Glad you are actually looking for advice. Keep your chin up bro.
The Bad= It does suck going through a break up. It can be hard.
The Good= Its a Vagina Party and your invited. Your single and young, go have fun bro!
With how you have described her you will have to be careful also. She is a attention whore. So since you have stopped giving her attention, she is going to be trying to get a hold of you, and i almost am positive she will try to get drilled by you again. When she tries this, do not fall for it. She is just trying to get your attention and get you back because you are actually ignoring her. So this will bring her back. Just as i said do not fall into that trap. It will seem fine for a little bit but in the end it will lead down to the same road you are at now.
Glad you are actually looking for advice. Keep your chin up bro.