Girls who broke your heart thread

W

Wrathcaster

Antarius said:
You already know what you"re doing wrong.... now you just have to fix it. If a woman is on a dating sate, she"s not looking for a friend, even if her profile says "looking for friends". Stop trying to be their friend, start trying to be their boyfriend. Remember, many women join dating sites for the same reason guys join dating sites.

I"m not saying what you"re doing is "wrong". I"m sure that both you AND the woman are enjoying the conversations... which is important. But you need to better direct and steer the conversations to achieve what both you and her are "actually" interested in.. ie: meeting and hooking up. Women are terrible initiators.
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Yeah, I feel ya. Like I said in another post, after Awlbiste (or whatever the fuck his name was, when I see it I think owl blister) asked me what happened when I asked them out... I realized I hadn"t really asked any of them out in a direct way. It was as easy as just sending every one of them a message asking if they wanted to go out with me. Response was overwhelmingly positive and surprising, especially after I read the stuff you guys posted about these girls getting 100s of messages a day.

I think the bit about setting yourself apart from others is important too, but I think in my case not being hideous and my career field did that for me already. That"s just supposition, though.

Funny enough, up until this point I"ve never dated/banged a black chick, an asian chick, or an indian chick. Somehow the first 3 responses I got back were from a black chick, an asian chick, and an indian chick.

As a strange aside, the black girl was smoking hot but puzzles me a bit: she said she only dates white guys. Don"t know what to make of that but I didn"t even talk to her, saw pics, read profile, sent her one message seeing if she wanted to go to dinner and got a message back 30 minutes later asking if I wanted to this weekend... Maybe she thinks I"m rich (I"m not) or just tries to bang every half-decent looking white dude that messages her? No idea.

BTW evil SK revenge guy: way to go posting tits and getting your sweet, sweet revenge but you might want to be careful in how far you take that shit. Depending on what you"ve done beyond just posting,where/how you"ve been distributing information about the girl, and the tone of your interactions with her and others, you could be opening yourself to civil liability (IIED, NIED, etc.), or depending on where you live, a misdemeanor criminal offense. Hate to be a lame killjoy but wouldn"t wanna see the bitch get the last laugh on you in court.
 
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Tenks

Bronze Knight of the Realm
14,163
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Silence said:
We were cruising towards marriage, and $4k for her last year"s worth of college tuition seemed like smart money at the time. Heck, it still seems like smart money now, and it wasn"t like I was her personal ATM anyway.
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Maybe I"m either overly cautious with my money, a dick or a relationship realist but until that ring is on the finger I wouldn"t see me lending a girl that kind of money. Even when we were married I"d need a damn good reason to know why she"d need that kind of cash. Loans for school would, I guess, be a good reason because of interest but I"d still prefer for her to figure out a way to get the money without having to rely upon me. Until the relationship is marriage in the eyes of the law I don"t see how you can say "Cruising towards marriage." I always see a relationship as either: casually dating, dating, long term, married. You are in one of the four black and white. "Long Term" does not mean you get to take my money.
 
Drinsic

Drinsic

privileged excrementlord
5,646
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Just a realist I"d say, but I understand the move. I think it"s pretty clear, they"re both in a long term relationship, and both people are seriously considering marriage. And at that point in time, they were both probably looking at each other as if they would be engaged in the near future. It"s certainly not the smartest move, logically speaking, but there"s a lot of illogical decisions made when women are involved.
 
Camerous

Camerous

Molten Core Raider
331
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It"s just 4 grand... you all act like he gave her a million and a house in the Hamptons or something *shakes head*
 
S

Silence_sl

shitlord
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Camerous Valde Unus said:
It"s just 4 grand... you all act like he gave her a million and a house in the Hamptons or something *shakes head*
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Yeh. It was $4k to finish college and get her degree, not like she was going out to buy garter belts and shoes with it...though I"d probably not complained a lot if she did . And it wasn"t just some flight of fancy on my part. We were good friends for 3 years and dated for 1 of that. Marriage to young folk like us seemed part of the natural progression of things, hence the cruising towards marriage bit.

She had shit worthless parents and that was what undid our relationship.
 
Ronaan

Ronaan

Molten Core Raider
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I once banged this girl who looked like she was in an abusive relationship she wanted to get out of.
I was white-knighting like there"s no tomorrow, thinking "oh I must rescue the poor lady!!!"1 ... when in truth she just wanted to be a cheating whore towards her boyfriend (father of her daughter too... at least that"s what everyone thought).

Long story short, one month we both had a 600 Euro phone bill and I sent her ? 300 to compensate. She said I"d get it back.

When I ended things and asked for my money back, she said her friend told her to just keep it and tell me it"s for the sex.
And that"s the last I heard of her.

I learned a lesson for life that day.
 
Eomer

Eomer

Trakanon Raider
5,472
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Tenks said:
Why the fuck are you people giving this much money to chicks? Hell I make my girlfriend pay me rent.
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If we"re talking in the thousands of dollars to pay off CC debt or a retarded car lease or something, then yeah unless the ring is on the finger then it"s probably not a great idea. If it"s for tuition or something equally worthwhile, make up a promissory note with terms, and both sign it. When shit goes south it might be a pain in the ass to collect on it, if not impossible, but at least you"ve got something on paper for it. And I think that even for the craziest bitch having it on paper with terms would at least make it a "real" loan to them, and not just their squeeze being a sucker.

For a few hundred dollars here and there, christ, just move on and forget about it. Especially if the relationship was longer than a couple months.

A good friend of mine just broke off his engagement with a girl that he"d helped pay off her retarded car loan and CC debt, had been living with him expense free for the past year and a half while she rented out and got income from her condo, and had a decent paying job. Not huge pay, but considering she had zero expenses AND a slight surplus of rental income after mortgage etc she should have been rolling in dough. But she wasn"t.

She wasn"t devious about it or anything, getting him to support her. He makes good money and is good with it, and thought he could help clean up her finances and teach her about money. After a year of engagement and 2-3 years of being together he realized she wasn"t going to change, she"d always live paycheck to paycheck and rack up CC debt. There was a few other things, all kind of interrelated in terms of her just not having much ambition, common sense or responsibility, so he ended it. I think reasonably amicably. No idea if he"s asked her for anything back, but he figured she was in to him for 20-30k.

But in the end I think he feels guilty about ending the relationship after asking her to marry him last year, and also realizes that he"s at least partly to blame for doing it. She never asked him to do any of it, he was just sick of seeing the bills go unpaid etc. And expensive lesson learned I guess.
 
W

Wrathcaster

Where are you guys finding these women? I"ve never, ever, ever had a chick I was dating or banging ask for money from me under any circumstances other than I already owed her for green or concert tickets or splitting a hotel room or something.

Granted, when I"m seriously dating someone I usually pay for dinner, movies, and miscellaneous date expenses but never have I paid someone"s bills or shelled out cash for... whatever. Most I"ve ever done was front a girl for a weekend at a music fest, which came out to maybe $1500 or so for both of us, but I was reimbursed after the trip and it was mutually understood I would be.

It"s not like I date exclusively rich women either, most were roughly on par with me financially. If a girl asked to borrow money from me or wanted me to pay her bills, I"d see it as a huge red flag.

Eomer said:
She wasn"t devious about it or anything, getting him to support her. He makes good money and is good with it, and thought he could help clean up her finances and teach her about money. After a year of engagement and 2-3 years of being together he realized she wasn"t going to change, she"d always live paycheck to paycheck and rack up CC debt. There was a few other things, all kind of interrelated in terms of her just not having much ambition, common sense or responsibility, so he ended it. I think reasonably amicably. No idea if he"s asked her for anything back, but he figured she was in to him for 20-30k.
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Barring some agreement between the two of them, and he did indeed ask her for $ back and she refused to pay, he"d pretty much be SOL. Unconditionally supporting her for years without any sort of understanding or stipulations like he did would probably be legally considered gifts and not something you could expect to collect on. Then again, you are in Canada so I don"t know what sort of fruitcake laws you guys have regarding domestic support and restitution.

But to those of you paying bitches with no sort of agreement on repayment, be on notice. You"re not gonna get that shit back unless she wants to give it back.
 
Drinsic

Drinsic

privileged excrementlord
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In my case, we were both in school and her lease had just ended shortly after moving in with me. They decided to tack on a few hundred dollars in extra fees due to "extensive damages" as college apartments like to do (which I found hysterical considering she was basically living at my place the whole time anyway). It was going to cost less in the long run if it was paid immediately, so I covered it. I don"t recall ever being asked for money outside of that.
 
Eomer

Eomer

Trakanon Raider
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Wrathcaster said:
Barring some agreement between the two of them, and he did indeed ask her for $ back and she refused to pay, he"d pretty much be SOL. Unconditionally supporting her for years without any sort of understanding or stipulations like he did would probably be legally considered gifts and not something you could expect to collect on. Then again, you are in Canada so I don"t know what sort of fruitcake laws you guys have regarding domestic support and restitution.

But to those of you paying bitches with no sort of agreement on repayment, be on notice. You"re not gonna get that shit back unless she wants to give it back.
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Absolutely agreed, and like I said my friend doesn"t really expect anything back I don"t think, and knows he"s really only got himself to blame for making her problems his. He"s not bitter about it or anything.

I think it varies from province to province and state to state, but co-habitating couples definitely have to be aware of the laws where they live regarding common law partnerships. In Alberta if you live with someone in an "interdependent" relationship for three years, bam, you"re common law and they can potentially come after your money:Adult interdependent relationship in Alberta - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

It"s more complicated than that, of course.
 
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