Lets talk about our dads

Hoss

Make America's Team Great Again
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My dad was pretty great. He died at age 53 I think. I'm 45 now so that's something that worries me. It was from a heart attack and the coroner said he had been having minor heart attacks for a while but the pain was being masked by pain he was getting from his tailbone. This was 20+ years ago so no need for condolences. I'm drunk though and thinking about him.

Anyway .... I remember fishing and hunting trips with him the most. A few times we even camped and hunted or fished for a few days. But most of the time it was spur of the moment. Mom took care of the money and she budgeted for his "piss off fund" (but he didn't know that). The piss off fund was usually used for these trips. I remember one time I flunked out of an honors english class because of one of these hunting trips. I mean, the teacher hated me anyway, but she used my week long absence as an excuse to not accept my homework assignment and flunked me down to a regular english class.

He could tell a joke as well as any comedian out there. He'd tell jokes that had you laughing halfway through before he even got close to the punch line.

He loved logic puzzles. We spent many an evening with him posing logical puzzles to us. The 3 men at the hotel (which he never could figure out himself), the 2 doors in the dungeon, and many more.

He split up with my mom for about a year because of his drinking (meaning she kicked him out). But he stopped drinking cold turkey and came back home. A few years later he had a beer and got sick and I think that was his last drink ever. I still can't figure out if he was really an alcoholic. In college we read a short story about a couple separating. There was a quiz about it asking what happened in the end and the answer the prof wanted was that they divorced. But I argued that it wasn't ever said and that they got back together after some time apart. That was when I learned how rare it was that my folks stayed together through a separation.

He was in the army during the Vietnam war but he was stationed in Germany teaching classes on chemical warfare. It always bothered him that he was so far away from the war.

He was a salesman, but he was proud of the fact that the never stooped to selling used cars. He taught me a lot of the salesman tricks and he taught me that even if I didn't want to be a salesman, I was selling myself every day no matter what my job was. I still enjoy going to car dealerships and watching them run the same fucking games he taught me 30+ years ago.

In his life he helped start at least 3 businesses and make them profitable. All but the last business were while working for someone else. He kept getting fucked over by the real owner. One of them that sticks out is a printing business that the owner lost in a goddamn card game. Another one was lost in a fucking car race. The last time he started his own business and he made a profit the year he died. It was 3 years ahead of the business plan he had given the SBA.

Before he entrepreneurial career he was part of the team that figured out how to make a mag mount antenna work. As a dabbler in radio shit I find that pretty cool. May not mean a lot to most of you. The hard part was getting a good ground plane according to him.

He died 2 weeks after I started my first real job as an engineer. I still remember his last piece of advice to me. He asked if there were any pretty girls at my new job. I said yeah. He said "well, don't shit where you eat boy. Don't shit where ya eat". He never met my wife but I think they would have gotten along great. They both have the same cynical thread running through everything they say.

At some point in college he taught me to always end conversations with "I love you" because you never know when you're speaking your last words to someone. I'm completely socially inept and couldn't figure that shit out on my own. Because of that my last words to him were "I love you".


Tell stories of how great (or how terrible if you're a miserable fuck) your dad was.
 

moonarchia

The Scientific Shitlord
15,111
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92d 21h 36m
My dad is 73. He is pretty great. He started a church in the town I grew up in and ran it for 38 years before he retired. He is the kindest person I have ever met. I have never heard him get angry or insulting of anyone ever. He would probably have been taken advantage of more by people if my mom wasn't the opposite that way.
 

mkopec

<Gold Donor>
23,154
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172d 19h 17m
My bio dad was a dick. I guess my mom and him got married too early at 19? I was probably the reason,lol. Never really saw him, he worked on a train in poland. All I ever remember about him was him drunk beating on my mom. Never really tried to contact him and neither did he. He ended up dying like 10 yrs back. /shrug He remarried after my mom and I came here to states so he had a new family.

My step dad here in the states was allright I guess but when he had his own kids with my mas I obviously took a back seat. I was already a teen at that point and I never gave a shit. I had a better relationship with his dad which was an old school carpenter/cabinet maker. Used to work summers with him making furniture and other shit to sell at craft shows. Learned a lot from him. Gramps was 100% better man than mt step dad which was a lazy do nothing kinda guy. Came home from work and lounged around 1/2 the time. No vacations, no drive to do anything. My mas actually pushed him to finish his BSME at age of like 33 or some shit, before he met my mas he lived at home with mommy, lol. 30 fucking years old living with mommy. Never saw what my mas saw in him I guess he never beat her? That was a bonus I guess. He ended up as an Engineer for GM, retired from there a few years ago. So now he lays around watching FOX news, never does anything, no hobbies, nothing, lol.
 
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Slaanesh69

Tranny Chaser
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71d 14h 44m
My Dad died just before Christmas day last year, and I had to say good bye to him over Zoom while my sister sat in his hospital room beside his induced-coma body, waiting to give the go ahead to pull the plug.

I will never forgive our society that. Never. Never, ever.

The Old Man and I never saw eye-to-eye - but later in life we found a common bond in golf and that brought us as close as we ever got. I still have the odd fond memory of brook fishing with him when I was 10-12 or so, a thing I enjoy doing to this day: the sound of the gurgling water still brings me peace. There was a running joke that the senior Slaanesh always caught the most fish, and I am continuing that with my own son.

I was surprised that I was very sad when his birthday came up a bit ago, and the thought of Father's Day.

He was a bit of a dick - and so am I, I am definitely his son.
 

MusicForFish

Tranny Chaser
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fathers day dad GIF
 

Big Phoenix

Pronouns: zie/zhem/zer
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I don't have one.
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I always wonder what is worse; having a father that completely walked out of your life, or having a father that was "around" but completely ignored you on every level as they pursued their own selfish interest. My father was "around". His sole purpose in life up until he became disabled was to fuck as many whores as possible, drink as much cheap beer as possible and occasionally make money off some side hustle.

My father ended up divorcing my mother right around the time I was born, he ended up living with a woman he had been cheating on my mom with. Once with her he spent the next 15 or so years going to sports/dive bars every weekend getting drunk and picking up whores. Even when we would be over at his house on the weekends when he was supposed to have us every night it would either be go out to the bar and get drunk or stay home and drink a case of beer by himself. This happened until eventually he got a dui which resulted in him spending time in county jail for 3-4 months. Once he was done with that he started having problems with his right hand that lead to it be 90% paralyzed so that brought an end to his whoring days, he would still drink though.

Wheres he now? Hes a diabetic amputee living alone on the other side of the US all the while no one cares about him. None of those whores he chased for 30 or so years are anywhere to be found. Hilarious thing is he thinks he did an ok job as a father. To him the benchmark for being a good parent is being a better parent to your kids than your own parents where to you so since he was, that means he did a good job. He didnt viciously beat us like his mother and stepfathers did and he paid his child support so he did okay in his book. If there any short comings its not his fault, but the fault of his parents not raising him right.
 
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Rajaah

Paperhands McGee
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View attachment 358964

I always wonder what is worse; having a father that completely walked out of your life, or having a father that was "around" but completely ignored you on every level as they pursued their own selfish interest. My father was "around". His sole purpose in life up until he became disabled was to fuck as many whores as possible, drink as much cheap beer as possible and occasionally make money off some side hustle.

My father ended up divorcing my mother right around the time I was born, he ended up living with a woman he had been cheating on my mom with. Once with her he spent the next 15 or so years going to sports/dive bars every weekend getting drunk and picking up whores. Even when we would be over at his house on the weekends when he was supposed to have us every night it would either be go out to the bar and get drunk or stay home and drink a case of beer by himself. This happened until eventually he got a dui which resulted in him spending time in county jail for 3-4 months. Once he was done with that he started having problems with his right hand that lead to it be 90% paralyzed so that brought an end to his whoring days, he would still drink though.

Wheres he now? Hes a diabetic amputee living alone on the other side of the US all the while no one cares about him. None of those whores he chased for 30 or so years are anywhere to be found. Hilarious thing is he thinks he did an ok job as a father. To him the benchmark for being a good parent is being a better parent to your kids than your own parents where to you so since he was, that means he did a good job. He didnt viciously beat us like his mother and stepfathers did and he paid his child support so he did okay in his book. If there any short comings its not his fault, but the fault of his parents not raising him right.

Yeah, my mom's father was an awful human being who did a lot of the same stuff you describe here, while also hitting his sons. I don't think he beat up his daughters, but he yelled at them enough that they were constantly afraid he'd hit them which is in a lot of ways just as mentally damaging. He'd also brag all the time about all the Nazis he killed, while getting drunk and generally acting like way more of a Nazi himself than the conscripted German farm-boys he killed probably were. So my mom would always make it a point to tell me that not having a dad, while sad and not the best case scenario, was at least better than having one who was awful/abusive. Addition by subtraction, basically.
 

Sterling

El Presidente
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My dad is great. He's in his 70s now. He joined the Air Force as a Combat Controller during Vietnam and sustained a serious training injury that required many surgeries. Instead of collecting disability he stayed in, rode a desk job and eventually retired 20+ years later. He met and eventually married my mother while stationed in Korea. The family moved around constantly for years while he got stationed in various places. I was born in Korea, we moved to a different base in Korea, then Washington, California, Germany, Florida, and finally North Dakota. He turned down orders a couple of times because he liked the school system and the lives my brother and I had there, not to mention the hunting and fishing. He eventually retired from the Air Force and stayed there. He took up a management role at some textile company and eventually retired from that as well. He now has a number of health issues but he's still chugging along and still married to my mother almost 50 years later.
 

Hoss

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My dad only met his dad once. He went his whole life thinking he had abandoned them. His sole memory was his dad showing up one day and giving him a dollar coin. Then he talked to my grandmother in private for a while and as he was leaving he borrowed the dollar from my dad for bus fare or something and promised to give him 2 next time.

After my dad died and as my grandmother was getting older, we found out the truth that she actually stole him from his dad. I mean, she was his real mom, but she kicked him out and wouldn't let him see him. Anytime he tried to come over she'd take my dad out the back door and cut out through the woods to a fishing hole.

Me and my sister are still trying to get together with that side of the family.
 

Chris

Potato del Grande
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86d 9h 50m
Mine spent all his time watching soap operas and sports he didn't care about while drinking multiple bottles of wine. Telling me to stop being noisy if I ever wanted to do anything else but criticising me if I spent time in a different room gaming or was quiet on gameboy/laptop.

Never took me anywhere to do anything father/son, just whole family trips to look around boring shops. We would argue about things I had an interest or skill in, he would never belive anything I learned and he didn't know. He bullied me on purpose to prepare me for workplace banter on a working class job, when I was clearly going to be going to university.

He has mellowed out now and controlled the drinking a little, he keeps trying to have a relationship with me over whatsapp and it's too fucking late. He is aging quite badly for someone in his late 50s and I don't expect him to last much longer.

Could have been worse, at least I was fed and clothed with two parents, but I learned nothing from him and he caused social anxiety in myself and my sister. Even the DIY I know is mostly from my mother and grandfathers.
 
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Lendarios

Trump's Staff
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My father is a good person, even though he divorced my mother when we were 7, we would have weekends visits with him. Probably the hardest thing he had to do as a parent was when me and my brother were 13 and 14, he had to sign the immigration authorizations so we can leave to Costa Rica. Then he did not see us for the next 6 years, and when he saw us again, me and my brother were already grown up as late teens, and he was never there to see us grow. I missed him terrible all those years, however I was never able to write him a letter, but he would always write to us whenever he could. That must have been tough on him. He is an old man now and lost half his left hand on a workplace accident 5 years ago. The surgeons were able to reattach it, but he lost the movement on the pinky and index finger of his left hand.
Overall he is very happy cheerful individual who can turn lemons into lemonade, and now likes to scare little kids with his "hook". Basically the fingers on his left hand fused together in the shape of a hook.
 

sleevedraw

Revolver Ocelot
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Dad's good. He's a software engineer who mostly retired this year, but still does a little PRN work on the side to stay sharp and give himself something to do. He used to be a drummer, is still big on music, and was the one who got me into Steely Dan, fusion, and blues. Very religious, church-every-Sunday Catholic; he used to be a communion server, but he's backed off somewhat from the Church, partially because of me, and partially because he hates Francis.

I had a somewhat rocky relationship with him growing up because he was trying to push me into engineering and math, and I was more interested in chem, bio, and history. He was also one of those types who acted somewhat distant and was quick to criticize but very slow with praise. High school was especially rough because I was super fearful of how he'd react if I mentioned I was working through sexuality issues.

However, he was a very good model for behavior - diligent, faithful to my mom, no vices, willing to sacrifice a lot of his own happiness to make sure the rest of his family was happy and well cared for. He did his best, and I respect him greatly for that. Since I've moved out, my relationship with him has improved greatly; I gave him a shock when I came out, but he became very supportive and gets along really well with my spouse, especially because he is also an engineer.

Son of a bitch can also eat 3000 calories a day and never gain a pound.
 

Vepil

Gamja
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I have a great dad, worked his ass off for his family laying asphalt in Georgia heat for over 40 years. Missed my high school football games, but I had everything I needed including him laying on the cold ground teaching me how to install a clutch over Thanksgiving weekend in the rain.

I vividly remember when I was 16 asking my dad to call in work for me sick so I could go goof off with my girlfriend. He told me he was disappointed in me and if I wanted to be a lazy p.o.s. I should call in. I got up and went to work and have never laid out of work for a non valid reason. My dad worked 60 plus hours a week most times leaving by 5 am and getting home well after dark to take care of us and I am trying to teach those same values to my son.

He worked his whole life to retire and a few months later learn he had stage 4 stomach and esophageal cancer. They did the treatments and surgery with the knowledge that it would buy him another 5 years or so before the cancer returns. According to the Dr. the kind he had is the kind that reoccurs regardless of how well the treatments go.

This week he took my boy for his first grandpa grandson camping and fishing trip. They had a blast and I am so happy he is getting to enjoy some of his retirement.

Happy Fathers Day guys.
 

Chukzombi

Millie's Staff Member
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my dad was a computer programmer starting in the 60s. he worked for IBM, later Sony Records, he was also a vietnam vet. never told me a damned thing about it. he very much loved the USA, but had a deep mistrust of our government. he could be strict at times, bedtime was 630pm during the school year, but in the summer it was much later. he was into all manner of nerd stuff and it all rubbed off on me. he passed 5 years ago and i miss him very much.
 

Fadaar

That guy
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99d 3h 16m
My dad's great, talk to both my parents regularly. They've been married since 1980 and are both 61 now. I think the best decision they ever made was waiting 5 years to have a kid (me in 1985). I think a lot of people rush into having kids without really giving it time to settle in to see if it will work long term. I'm not married, no kids, so obviously I'm no authority but it just seems like a good idea. Anyway -- my dad and I have always gotten along well, though tbh as an actual parent he kinda sucked at the job lol. Not an insult really but my mom didn't work from the time she got pregnant with me until after I graduated high school, so he didn't really do much besides work his ass off to provide for the family. I do however place 100% blame on him for me being an electronics/video game crackhead. He was partner for a small business in Tampa and was basically the IT guy for the company. Not a lot of people, never more than like 12. But he still stayed busy keeping the computers, network, and all that mess going. This started in the late 80's and continued until he sold his half of the company in.... 2014? Somewhere around there. Anyway, due to that he always brought old or extra hardware home so I became a huge PC nerd really early in life and still am to this day. I remember I borrowed the original StarCraft from a friend of mine, back in the days when CD burners were still brand new to the home market. Over the years he may have bought duplicates for work that magically ended up at home, CD/DVD burners being one of those. Sure he'd use it for work every now and then but music CD's and copying games were what we used it for the most. Anyway, it still gives me a laugh that when I asked him to copy the CD for me that he went to the trouble to scan the jacket inside the CD case and printed it out so my pirate copy would kinda sorta look legit lol. Since I joined the AF in 2010 and got into firearms it rekindled his love for that too, he used to hunt a lot before I was born but pretty much stopped especially once we moved to Tampa in 1988. These days we usually hit up a local range whenever I'm in town. Come to think of it one of these days we need to go deer hunting...
 

Cupcaek

Molten Core Raider
633
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18d 11h 31m
My mom basically kidnapped me from my Dad and went half way across the country when I was a few months old. (For no real reason) He found us when i was about 7 and I finally met him then. Would do the usual fly out for the summers and christmas time, with talks on the phone every week. Things always seemed to be great. Would do all kinds of fun things, amusement parks, video games, movies, camps, basically anything you could imagine that was fun as a kid we would do together. Except sports stuff, he loved to watch hockey but god was he one of the most unathletic nerds you would ever come across. Then he remarried and had kids when I was around 12. Things didnt change to much in our relationship though he did teach me how to play Starcraft and Everquest around then. When I was 15 the usual teenage bullcrap ran through me and I decided to move in with my Dad across the country instead of living with my mom anymore. From there everything changed as he was no longer the "fun" parent I saw for 6 weeks a year. He clearly didn't really know how to handle a teenager and his own young kids. In addition to my step mom who wanted nothing to do with me. We grew apart, partly my fault and partly his/step moms. I moved out a little before I turned 18 and still kept in touch with him and met with him weekly. Then when I turned 18 he didnt call or anything at all to wish my happy birthday which really bummed me out. He grew very distant shortly after that and then basically let my grandma (his mom who i was living with) know that he didnt really want anything to do with his family anymore because he had a knew family that didnt include me. That was almost 15 years ago now and he still hasnt spoken to his mother.

I reached out to him a few times and got nothing back, including inviting him to my wedding and sending him a picture of his newborn grandaughter. Most I got back was a "She is beautiful." I was really hoping that it might have been the spark to get him back into my life for the sake of my kids if nothing else, but nothing came of it. Still crushes me now thinking about how my poor kids will not grow up having a grandmother or grandfather on my side of the family. Thankfully my wifes family is wonderful and my dad's sisters and mother are basically fill in grandparents and couldn't love my kids anymore than they do.
But ya, thats my dad.
 

Chukzombi

Millie's Staff Member
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176,648
My mom basically kidnapped me from my Dad and went half way across the country when I was a few months old. (For no real reason) He found us when i was about 7 and I finally met him then. Would do the usual fly out for the summers and christmas time, with talks on the phone every week. Things always seemed to be great. Would do all kinds of fun things, amusement parks, video games, movies, camps, basically anything you could imagine that was fun as a kid we would do together. Except sports stuff, he loved to watch hockey but god was he one of the most unathletic nerds you would ever come across. Then he remarried and had kids when I was around 12. Things didnt change to much in our relationship though he did teach me how to play Starcraft and Everquest around then. When I was 15 the usual teenage bullcrap ran through me and I decided to move in with my Dad across the country instead of living with my mom anymore. From there everything changed as he was no longer the "fun" parent I saw for 6 weeks a year. He clearly didn't really know how to handle a teenager and his own young kids. In addition to my step mom who wanted nothing to do with me. We grew apart, partly my fault and partly his/step moms. I moved out a little before I turned 18 and still kept in touch with him and met with him weekly. Then when I turned 18 he didnt call or anything at all to wish my happy birthday which really bummed me out. He grew very distant shortly after that and then basically let my grandma (his mom who i was living with) know that he didnt really want anything to do with his family anymore because he had a knew family that didnt include me. That was almost 15 years ago now and he still hasnt spoken to his mother.

I reached out to him a few times and got nothing back, including inviting him to my wedding and sending him a picture of his newborn grandaughter. Most I got back was a "She is beautiful." I was really hoping that it might have been the spark to get him back into my life for the sake of my kids if nothing else, but nothing came of it. Still crushes me now thinking about how my poor kids will not grow up having a grandmother or grandfather on my side of the family. Thankfully my wifes family is wonderful and my dad's sisters and mother are basically fill in grandparents and couldn't love my kids anymore than they do.
But ya, thats my dad.
just feel blessed that your kids have some kind of grandparents. i came from a very old family. all my grandparents and most of my aunts and uncles were all dead by the time i reached 19. most of them were born in the late 1800s/early 1900s
 
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