Marriage and the Power of Divorce

Adebisi

Clump of Cells
<Silver Donator>
27,679
32,721
Can't do Jiu-Jitsu tonight, girlfriend having her bi-weekly mental breakdown regarding her bird tearing out its feathers. Only No Gi Randori of the week...


altumatium comes soon

-Find a new boyfriend

-Get rid of bird

Probably both for both our sakes, relationship is not working, and she's not capable of handling the bird short of getting an avian specialist as a boyfriend to take over.
bird tits or gtfo
 

Cad

<Bronze Donator>
24,492
45,421
Can't do Jiu-Jitsu tonight, girlfriend having her bi-weekly mental breakdown regarding her bird tearing out its feathers. Only No Gi Randori of the week...


altumatium comes soon

-Find a new boyfriend

-Get rid of bird

Probably both for both our sakes, relationship is not working, and she's not capable of handling the bird short of getting an avian specialist as a boyfriend to take over.
People really break up over pet stress?
 

Khane

Got something right about marriage
19,854
13,372
Sounds to me more like she's completely bonkers, doesn't take care of the pet at all and then uses it as an excuse to try to completely domineer his time. Thus his mention of not being able to go to jiu-jitsu.

Pretty reasonable to want to cut ties with that kind of behavior if that's the case.
 

iannis

Musty Nester
31,351
17,656
Birds tear out their feathers when they're stressed don't they?

She should treat the bird better.
 
  • 1Like
Reactions: 1 user

Voyce

Shit Lord Supreme
<Donor>
7,168
23,454
Sounds to me more like she's completely bonkers, doesn't take care of the pet at all and then uses it as an excuse to try to completely domineer his time. Thus his mention of not being able to go to jiu-jitsu.

Pretty reasonable to want to cut ties with that kind of behavior if that's the case.
I spent all of tonight:
cleaning the bird cage, a process that according to her averages 3-4 hours, but was miraculous managed in 20 minutes when I told her to cut the shit out, because she's not detailing a car.

Her feeding the bird a pizza the dinning room table.

Her taking the bird upstairs, to give attention, followed by her screaming "calm down" at the bird. Then screaming at me to stop playing games and come up and "spray the bird with water" or something. which i ignored, followed by her hysterically breaking down for the second time since she got home. If your wondering I was not playing a game (I play a video game, maybe once every three months), or doing anything when I ignored her, I just refuse to acknowledge her when she tries to throw her child level tantrums.

We are currently sitting down with the tv off in silence, while she fucks with her laptop, the bird is asleep, and I'm on my phone.

Bare in mind if I spend any length of time on my laptop/phone at her place she starts her shit up, because I should be a vegetable on the couch watching whatever mediocre show, because consuming mediocre tv programming is ok of we're both doing it.
 

Voyce

Shit Lord Supreme
<Donor>
7,168
23,454
Birds tear out their feathers when they're stressed don't they?

She should treat the bird better.
What started the plucking? Who the fuck knows, maybe I yelled at the stupid thing for pissing me off, maybe I got into an argument with the gf, maybe the bird saw something outside...

Why is the bird continuing to pluck? Because the GF is red alert losing her shit because of her plucking.

Literally as I type this the GF just started crying while reading a forum on how to stop the plucking, the bird just woke up and started plucking.
 

iannis

Musty Nester
31,351
17,656
3 hours to clean a birdcage?

20 minutes TOPS. And that's if you haven't done it in a while.

Jesus Lord... some people should not have exoctic pets. I'm not a big fan of birds as pets (it seems cruel to me to cage them as a matter of habit, a bird without the sky is a eunuch) but they are not difficult to care for and understand.

They're odd creatures though. My uncle has a parrot that used to bite the absolute hell out of me. I have two scars that that bird gave me. He went to town on my arm like it was a piece of meat. Which I guess it is. He'd have crazy fits. Until one day he started having a crazy-fit and I decided that I didn't want a 3rd scar, so I flipped him onto his back and started thumping the shit out of his beak. He made a racket.

But that bird has absolutely loved me ever since, and been nothing but a buddy. He'll ride on my shoulder whenever I go over there and steer me with different sorts of clicks. He's not quite as stupid as I thought he was. But he does have the attention span of... a bird.
 

mkopec

<Gold Donor>
25,424
37,545
Dude at work had one, and it liked fries. Yeah, fucking McDonalds French fries. Also its best friend was a lab the dude had. It rode on its back and actually told them when she needed to go outside. Totally cool. Then the lab died and the bird was depressed for a while. Definitely cool animals.
 

Palum

what Suineg set it to
23,565
34,000
It's a bird. Literally a rat of the sky. Just toss it out the window or something, it's got wings.
 

Noodleface

A Mod Real Quick
37,961
14,508
"Sorry baby your bird flew away when I was cleaning its cage for 4 hours, oops"

My wife has been a bit insane lately and it's driving me nuts too. I mean, I understand it due to the circumstances, but I still am not enjoying it. I came home last night and as I walked up to the front door I could hear my child screaming at the top of his lungs and crying hysterically - wife was on the couch and put him in timeout for something I don't really understand and was on the verge of tears herself. Before I turned the key to enter the house I did a long sigh, I knew I was in for a long night - and I was.

It reminded me of that scene in Marley and Me where Owen Wilson comes home and sees chaos in his house and just sits in the car for an extra minute.
 

Tenks

Bronze Knight of the Realm
14,163
606
My anniversary was yesterday. I got my wife a card and she didn't get me one. I'm going to lord it over her for a while. Her reasoning was because I didn't get her a card last year she thought we weren't doing cards.