Marriage and the Power of Divorce

Guys, Ryan Gosling isn't even fucking good looking.

Come on.

I believe most of the "He's so hot!" feelings most women have towards some of these actors is mostly from the roles they play. Yes they are very naturally attractive people. In shape and with good bone structure and all that. But then they see this guy play this role in a movie like The Notebook and suddenly they have this emotional attachment to him as well. They see his face and associate all the great things he did in that movie and it compounds the attraction. I'm 99% sure that is why my wife is all about that dude from True Blood who is now dating Sophia Vargara. Forget his name. Dude is jacked up but she also only knows him as this great protector of the woman he loves as well.

Or I could just be making shit up and they are just attracted and thats that

I was using him as an example of a well-groomed, in-shape, charismatic man on the dating scene. In contrast to:

Eidal_sl said:

As an addendum, I'm pretty sure that a year spent EFFICIENTLY in the gym and a session or two with some type of fashion consultant would elevate most "normal men" to movie-star level of attractiveness. I live in fucking GA and I'm pretty sure that I could hire someone to take me through a couple stores and show me how to dress like a real man easily enough.

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I would really like to be in good shape, but I just have no idea how people get themselves to do it. Basically, every single day I go "Well, I'm going to at least do some sit ups and push ups or something today" and every night I go to bed going "Well, I had plenty of chances and never did it... I'll try again tomorrow." REPEAT.

To me I just go "This feels bad, I don't like it, I don't see any immediate change......." and its just really hard to move past that.

I know no one can do anything about that but me, and while I've successfully lost weight this last year through changing my eating habits, I've probably worked out all of 4 times... in a year... that I was telling myself I need to do it.

And yes, I'm sure I would have more confidence if I wasn't chubby. I don't know that that would change everything, but yeah, I'm sure it would be positive.

Tenks_sl said:

I believe most of the "He's so hot!" feelings most women have towards some of these actors is mostly from the roles they play. Yes they are very naturally attractive people. In shape and with good bone structure and all that. But then they see this guy play this role in a movie like The Notebook and suddenly they have this emotional attachment to him as well. They see his face and associate all the great things he did in that movie and it compounds the attraction. I'm 99% sure that is why my wife is all about that dude from True Blood who is now dating Sophia Vargara. Forget his name. Dude is jacked up but she also only knows him as this great protector of the woman he loves as well.

Or I could just be making shit up and they are just attracted and thats that

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He's attractive because he's in shape and well-groomed. His face is garbage man.

And Kirun, reading through one of his posts just has "confused homo" written all over it.

Onoes_sl said:

I would really like to be in good shape, but I just have no idea how people get themselves to do it. Basically, every single day I go "Well, I'm going to at least do some sit ups and push ups or something today" and every night I go to bed going "Well, I had plenty of chances and never did it... I'll try again tomorrow." REPEAT.

To me I just go "This feels bad, I don't like it, I don't see any immediate change......." and its just really hard to move past that.

I know no one can do anything about that but me, and while I've successfully lost weight this last year through changing my eating habits, I've probably worked out all of 4 times... in a year... that I was telling myself I need to do it.

And yes, I'm sure I would have more confidence if I wasn't chubby. I don't know that that would change everything, but yeah, I'm sure it would be positive.

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Join a fucking gym, get a decent PT, learn how to deadlift, bench, and squat.

You don't get in fucking shape by saying "I want to do sit-ups."

Lol, I have a friend who cycles through the "I want to get in shape" ---> "too busy, priorities changed" every few months. He ALWAYS comes up with some ridiculous routine like: twenty minutes elliptical, twenty crunches, twenty pushups.

For me it was a complete and total lifestyle change. It started with a girl I was trying to impress. This was right out of high school. I worked with her and noticed the only dudes she dated were football players who were far more built than I was despite playing hockey my entire life. So I started to work out like a mad man. Bought a benchpress and put it in my parents basement. Bought free weights. Eventually bought a punching bag. I went from 120 pounds (on a 5'10" frame ... I was lanky as fuck) to 145 pounds in maybe 1.5 years. I also always had the goal to cleanly benchpress double my body weight which really help me focus on where I was and where I wanted to be. That was maybe 10 years ago now. It has just become somewhat engrained in my mind that if I don't work out hard at least twice a week I feel like a fat slob. I've stopped going for gains and prefer just maintenance at this point since I find huge bulky muscles not only non-functional but also sort of gross but still just do the basic shit I have been doing for 10 years.

Never dated the girl

Itlan_sl said:

Join a fucking gym, get a decent PT, learn how to deadlift, bench, and squat.

You don't get in fucking shape by saying "I want to do sit-ups."

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You can get into decent shape doing prison workouts. A few people at my office have gotten into killer shape doing P90X stuff. I didn't care for it personally but they've lost a ton of weight and have better muscle definition.

Tenks_sl said:

Never dated the girl

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Usually how it happens!

I feel like a fat slob on my rest days.

Tenks_sl said:

You can get into decent shape doing prison workouts. A few people at my office have gotten into killer shape doing P90X stuff. I didn't care for it personally but they've lost a ton of weight and have better muscle definition.

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My point was he's not going to get in shape being a dumbass at home doing 20 pushups and 20 crunches. He'd be better off jerking off until his calf cramps.

Get a program, stick to it.

Itlan_sl said:

My point was he's not going to get in shape being a dumbass at home doing 20 pushups and 20 crunches. He'd be better off jerking off until his calf cramps.

Get a program, stick to it.

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Apparently my jerking off IS a program....

Go back a page, I just answered it. At most, I drink 2 nights a week, otherwise I drink nothing but water. On an average night out I would say I drink the equivalent of 3-5 beers, or a bottle of wine, over the course of 5 hours. It's rare for me to have a beer at home, but I probably drink a 6 pack a month maybe?

So yeah, I think I'm in the bottom percentile of alcohol drinkers in the U.S., that's not why my stories tend to start out "I was out drinking", it's because the only time I'm out to have a story is when I go out drinking. My other hobbies don't involve me meeting other people to create new stories.

Well, I don't know if things are different in some of your's neck of the woods, but usually when I'm with my friends in a social setting, at night, we are drinking. Or in some cases 10 AM like mardi gras in a couple of weeks.

As far as getting into better shape, I know its cliche', but what tenks said. It has to be a lifestyle change. Thinking you can just eat better for a few weeks/couple of months and get into shape is only going to end in failure. Not working out is just no longer an option for me, I look at it like brushing my teeth or taking a shit, its something I've got to do.

mures_sl said:

Well, I don't know if things are different in some of your's neck of the woods, but usually when I'm with my friends in a social setting, at night, we are drinking. Or in some cases 10 AM like mardi gras in a couple of weeks.

As far as getting into better shape, I know its cliche', but what tenks said. It has to be a lifestyle change. Thinking you can just eat better for a few weeks/couple of months and get into shape is only going to end in failure. Not working out is just no longer an option for me, I look at it like brushing my teeth or taking a shit, its something I've got to do.

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Maybe it doesn't help that I'm also from LA and that's the culture? But if I go out drinks are involved 90% of the time. These dudes are either some lames or just trying to give him shit because it's ones.

I usually have some whisky like ... 5 nights a week to relax before going to bed. I probably shouldn't do it that often but Onoes doesn't drink very much at all according to his drinking schedule.

Tenks_sl said:

I usually have some whisky like ... 5 nights a week to relax before going to bed. I probably shouldn't do it that often but Onoes doesn't drink very much at all according to his drinking schedule.

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Sounds like you have other problems than drinking to worry about. Get professional help instead of selfmedicating booze.

Still getting a lot of out of state messages and even out of country messages. DC, Belfast, Florida. I guess I could be a sugar daddy if I really wanted to... to women with really low sugar daddy monetary standards. That chick from Belfast was a bad bitch though as the brothas say.