So, the shorter form is this. A few weeks ago I went out with a couple of friends and was drinking fairly heavily. I was introduced to a girl and her husband, and they ended up hanging out with us. The next day, the girl added me on Facebook.
Cut to an Oktoberfest party a few weeks ago. Out of the blue I get a Facebook message from the girl asking if I'm going out by any chance, she's had a bad week and needs to get out. I thought it was weird, because I hadn't spoken to her since that night, she's married, and I don't really know her, but I let her know where I was. A couple hours later she shows up and starts telling me she could use a drink. I point out to her where the bar is, but I don't offer to get her a drink or anything.
Now, just to be clear, I'm not attracted to her. She's my height, and built like a linebacker. She's not a bad looking girl or anything, she was just large. I tend to like tiny girls. The other thing is that this girl is loud and kind of obnoxious.
So anyway, the night is going on, and it becomes clear she is kind of hanging on me. I keep moving myself out of the situation, but she won't let up. A couple other people point it out and ask me who the annoying girl is who is all over. So, the next time she comes up and kind of puts her arm around me I say "Whoa now, you're getting pretty friendly, where's your husband at?" And she proceeds to tell me how her husband left the previous weekend and filed for divorce. They are on terrible terms and he is leaving her, and she just needed to get out. I talk to her a little, and then kind of make my escape when she's distracted. I leave with some friends and go to another bar. A couple of hours later she shows up with a couple other people to the new bar and laughs and says how she found me and now I need to buy her a drink. I say "yeah yeah" and go inside (we were on a back patio thing at the bar). I go to the counter and look at my phone. It's 1:45a.m. I'm feeling pretty beat, and I just go "Ehhh fuck it" and leave out the front, and go home.
So, she starts Facebook messaging me off and on and I'm being friendly, but I basically respond to her 1 in 10 or so messages. Just kind of trying to blow her off without being a jerk about it.
So... one night she starts messaging me about how we should hang out, and I tell her I'm really busy most of the time. She says "Well how about now?" and I let her know I was already in bed and pretty much just surfing the web a bit before I went to sleep. She then starts talking about how she's feeling really lonely, and wishes she had a guy there so she wouldn't have to take care of herself. I'm kind of making jokes about it, but she keeps sending stuff about how its no big deal or anything, and if I wasn't doing anything, why not get together just for sex? The more she talks the more I'm like "Ehhhhh why not?"
So, sure enough, I go and have sex with her. It was weird. Because I was pretty much not attracted to her at all, and she was just kind of big. I kind of felt like the woman the entire time. Like, she was physically larger than me, and she would kind of lock my legs with her legs, and hug me to her with her arms. I'm used to having a lot more freedom of movement during sex, but with her it was just kind of like I was on top of her but pinned with a wrestling move, and we were just grinding our crotches together. I almost started laughing twice because it seemed ridiculous. While we were having sex I was just thinking "I've made a huge mistake.". Afterwards, we talked for a minute, but it just seemed kind of awkward, and I left. She sent me a bunch of happy texts that night, I responded with "Yeah, that was nice, thanks, goodnight".
Woke up to like 42 texts, all just about how she can't stop thinking about me, how she's never had an orgasm without a vibrator, and how I better be ready because she's addicted to me. Shit like that. I typed up a big long "Look, I had a good time last night, but you were pretty clear that it wasn't going to be a big deal, and you are kind of making it a big deal now. I'm not really interested in making that a regular thing, and like I said, I'm very busy, I don't anticipate us hanging out regularly or anything." To which she came back with "Well, I thought it wasn't going to be a big thing, but obviously I was wrong. I really needed that last night and sorry, but I want more of the same! lol, so be ready to have me all over your jock every night! haha". So, I typed up a much bigger and clearer "That's not ever going to happen again, sorry."
So, for the next 5 days she would alternate messaging me either how much she wanted me, how much this whole thing was horseshit and she can't believe I'm rejecting her, and tons of pity party stuff (like, I guess my soon to be ex husband is right and I'm just unlovable and old right??). I rarely responded, and usually it was just "Hey, sorry but I don't have time to respond to all you're texting. I know you know, but at this point nothing is going to happen between us, I'm sure you will find someone who is a better match for you, you're a nice girl."
She stopped for a couple days and then started up again out of the blue.
I stopped responding at all. Mostly she was still just sending nice things, NOTHING like the first bi-polar girl I was with. This one was mostly just lonely and desperate I guess, but not only did she annoy me as a person, I just was not into her sexually at all. So yeah, sorry but no.
Finally, last Tuesday after she blew up my phone with a bunch of texts talking about how she just wants to be friends and hang out, I sent a big "Look, I hate to be a jerk, but you're not giving me much choice in the matter, you have to stop texting me. I decided I don't have a desire to pursue any kind of romantic realationship with you, and you know I'm busy. What limited free time I do have I would rather spend pursuing thing I am interested in. I'm sorry, I don't want there to be hard feelings or anything, but you are looking for a serious thing, someone to spend every day with, and that's not me. I don't know a better way to do this, we won't be hanging out again, I'm sorry, I wish you luck, but this is goodbye."
She responded with "Dude, you're hardcore. K bye."
And it's been radio silence ever since.
I know it was dumb, it had just been a while since the last thing with the CA girl, and despite my intentions of saying no, and my complete lack of desire for her, an hour of texts talking about how wet she was and what she wanted to do to me made me re-evaluate that position. I knew it was a mistake right away. Hopefully it's done.
