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Arative

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We're investing in 529 plans for both of our kids that will help with college but that's probably all we'll do for them.
 
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Superhiro

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Who does the book recommend leaving the money to?

I forget if it made any specific recommendations. It was more about looking at the financial habits of people that are millionaires. A lot end up finding ways to dodge inheritance taxes through donating it or whatever.

I bet you'd just take the leftover money and make it a long-term trust so that future generations can benefit from free education.
 
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a c i d.f l y

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It's been a while since I read it, but "The Millionaire Next Door" has a chapter about how leaving money for your kids has a negative impact of like -30% of total earnings compared to their peers, while only leaving money to pay for 100% of their education gives them +30% earnings compared to peers.

Those numbers are kinda pulled out of my ass, but the big takeaway was don't give your kids money, just as much of their education as you can possibly afford if you want to set them up for success.
This sorta works. At least for my wife. Grandfather inheretence paid for her education, so her base starting income is a lot higher than it would have been if she'd only gotten her RN (w debt) vs. an RN+bachelor's in nursing, though her income hasn't had any major shifts in nearly 20 years besides cost of living/standard raises.

I don't plan to pay for any of my kid's schooling. I'm not endebting myself at 60 for that, or saving anything on top of my own retirement/savings. She'll need to earn scholarships or go into an affordable tech school, or something else. Definitely going to steer away from what some friends I know have done, like accruing $200k in debt just to get a Masters in something that doesn't pay more or less than a BA/BS. I don't personally have a degree (3.5 years of college, though...), and while having one certainly would have increased my wages, I don't nor have I ever had any debt from school (classes paid for by Pell grant the first year and employer benefits if I earned an A after that).

With the way things are going, by the time she hits college it's probably going to cost $1.5m for a degree and fuck that.
 
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Noodleface

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1.5 year old must be going through a sleep regression. Last week around 1am he's been waking up and crying all night. Last night it was the two kids combined until 4am, with me up at 630 for work. Absolutely feel like shit.

FUCK KIDS
 
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Arative

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They're in the same room aren't they? That's got to make for some shitty situations when one wakes up and then wakes the other up. My son loves to wake up in the middle of the night and open his door and call for me. As soon as I make it to his door, he jumps back in bed and is asleep in less than 2 minutes. My daughter just turned one and is sleeping through the night, she's my current favorite child.
 

Dashel

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Shit posting aside, does anyone here have any serious concerns about the schools their kids go to? I do not have any major concerns but I do feel like I need to do some extra parenting to kind of balance things out. I went to the middle school my son will likely be going into next year. The social studies class had a lot of Black Lives Matter stuff up and the teacher was talking about how "FACTS" matter, and she stressed "critical thinking".

Put it this way, I fully expect a slanted view in the town I'm in. Diversity and Equity talk is constant here. On the other hand I don't think I can shelter my kids from this stuff. That said I don't necessarily need them inundated with it either. I'm going to the other middle school tonight. I'm expecting more of the same but maybe a bit less... the one tonight is the STEM Science and Math focused school, whereas the other one was the Arts and Performance focused school.
 

error

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So thoughts on trust funds, kids and money etc?

You don't need to amass all kinds of money to think about setting up a trust in the event of your death. The sale of a house, the liquidation of your 401k, life insurance, savings account, etc. I recently went through divorce and one of the first things I did was set up a will, so that my ex won't see a dime of my money when I die (she would by default). I already had the idea that my daughters will pay for school themselves, obtain grants, scholarships or whatever else they can and once they succeed, if I have the money, I will most likely help them pay it off. So, when I sat down to think through how I would set the verbiage of my will, I had that in mind. Whether it's a good way or not, shrug...

They won't get any of the money unless my father or brother deem it necessary for their survival before they graduate college (hopefully my ex can cover all that with her well paying career and douchebag new married co-worker BF). Once they graduate with a 4 year degree (I don't give a fuck what degree) then they'll get the money immediately, otherwise they have to wait until they're 30. I figure by 30 you're either mature enough or you aren't and I've done the best I can controlling the inheritance from the grave without making it too complicated for my family/trustee.
 

Noodleface

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They're in the same room aren't they? That's got to make for some shitty situations when one wakes up and then wakes the other up. My son loves to wake up in the middle of the night and open his door and call for me. As soon as I make it to his door, he jumps back in bed and is asleep in less than 2 minutes. My daughter just turned one and is sleeping through the night, she's my current favorite child.
Yes, but usually they don't wake eachother up
 

fred sanford

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Shit posting aside, does anyone here have any serious concerns about the schools their kids go to? I do not have any major concerns but I do feel like I need to do some extra parenting to kind of balance things out. I went to the middle school my son will likely be going into next year. The social studies class had a lot of Black Lives Matter stuff up and the teacher was talking about how "FACTS" matter, and she stressed "critical thinking".

Put it this way, I fully expect a slanted view in the town I'm in. Diversity and Equity talk is constant here. On the other hand I don't think I can shelter my kids from this stuff. That said I don't necessarily need them inundated with it either. I'm going to the other middle school tonight. I'm expecting more of the same but maybe a bit less... the one tonight is the STEM Science and Math focused school, whereas the other one was the Arts and Performance focused school.

Yes, my son started Kindergarten this year and I dug through every piece of information I could find on the schools in our area. It's sad but I didn't even visit the schools because I saw enough information on the school scorecards available from the county and demographics. You can look up demographics from K-12 school quality information and parenting resources. In the end we sent him to a private school.
 
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Captain Suave

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does anyone here have any serious concerns about the schools their kids go to?

We're renting homes in a much nicer area than we would/could otherwise afford to live. Paying an extra 30-50% in rent for 12-15 years is utterly trivial compared to the cost of sending two kids to private school. (That and the cost of rental is <60% the cost of ownership here so we get to live in nicer places in the mean time.)
 
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Keystone

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that's a pretty interesting idea i hadn't considered...just planned on buying but the accountant in me wants to start making spreadsheets now looking into the cost/benefit of doing that instead while they are in school.
 

Quineloe

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Shit posting aside, does anyone here have any serious concerns about the schools their kids go to? I do not have any major concerns but I do feel like I need to do some extra parenting to kind of balance things out. I went to the middle school my son will likely be going into next year. The social studies class had a lot of Black Lives Matter stuff up and the teacher was talking about how "FACTS" matter, and she stressed "critical thinking".

Put it this way, I fully expect a slanted view in the town I'm in. Diversity and Equity talk is constant here. On the other hand I don't think I can shelter my kids from this stuff. That said I don't necessarily need them inundated with it either. I'm going to the other middle school tonight. I'm expecting more of the same but maybe a bit less... the one tonight is the STEM Science and Math focused school, whereas the other one was the Arts and Performance focused school.

I don't really see why you'd need to "shelter" your kid from opinions you disagree with. Have some faith you didn't raise a moron.

I'm legit afraid I'm gonna murder a teacher if it turns out this "no your solution is wrong because despite being correct, it's not the one I wanted" crap is actually real.
 
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Captain Suave

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that's a pretty interesting idea i hadn't considered...

Run your rent/buy options through this and compare to the cost of private tuition.

Is It Better to Rent or Buy?

Where I'm at in LA in an A++ school district the houses are $1.5-3.5M and rent is $3500. That's FAR less than the interest on an equivalent mortgage unless you were putting $1M+ down, plus maintenance isn't your problem. It's a no brainer. (Yes, that's a lot of rent in absolute but it's a conscious choice to be here.) Even if we could pay $15-20k a year less than that in rent in a shit school district it's still a big savings compared to two private school tuitions, plus the kids can walk instead of my driving them across town.
 
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Dashel

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I don't really see why you'd need to "shelter" your kid from opinions you disagree with. Have some faith you didn't raise a moron.

I'm legit afraid I'm gonna murder a teacher if it turns out this "no your solution is wrong because despite being correct, it's not the one I wanted" crap is actually real.

I have no doubt teachers will do that. It's actually good training for work and life outside school. We all know plenty of seemingly normal people who get completely irrational on certain topics. It happens a lot.
 

Jalynfane

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Oldest completed HS early and starts in a month and youngest got into a charter school, yay! Stressful last few weeks
 
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Ao-

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Went to Disneyland with the fam over spring break... including my brother and his GF and my mom+stepdad. It was great but holyfuck that is expensive.
 

lurkingdirk

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I have five kids. Every one of them has something happening tonight. Couple of hockey games, soccer game, orchestra concert, and a piano recital. How the hell do we choose? Certainly one of us will be at the piano recital, as one of the kids is doing solo work. The orchestra concert seems the likely other choice, as it's the first concert of the season, but it's the final hockey game for one, and one is starting midfield for the first time at her soccer game.

Some of our kids will hate us by tomorrow morning.