Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem (2023)

Aldarion

Egg Nazi
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LOL the rich did this, nothing gets made without money. If I invest billions into woke culture then you can point me out, until then this looks like 13-15 year old ninja turtles and might be a fun take on what made them fun. The recent movies set the bar so low that this can't be worse.
Nothing gets made without money... do you imagine they spent all that money as some kind of charitable donation?

You know they *make* money off this stuff, right?

Now where do you imagine they get that money? You might ponder this while watching them gangrape your childhood memories.
 

Intrinsic

Person of Whiteness
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1679403490410.png

I feel as if, okay yeah, I can see this working... no idea who this Natasia person is. Jackie Chan is fine, Ice Cube can still do his black stereotype schtick, John Cena and Esposito play themselves in everything.

1679403559882.png

Nope, I'm out.
 
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Rajaah

Honorable Member
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Reposted from my other thread...again

I've determined that there's a weird formula going on in The Entertainment Industry:

Step 1: Find an iconic female redhead character that's beloved by millions of people.
Step 2: Start re-making that property.
(The fanbase gets excited)
Step 3: Re-cast the iconic redhead as a black woman.
Step 4: Center the marketing around showing everyone that the iconic redhead has been replaced.
(The fanbase is a little off-put because one of their favorite characters now looks nothing like what they grew up with)
Step 5: Wait for all of the usual suspect websites to praise your remake for being diverse, and have your marketing department rail against the "racist backlash" forming online.
(The fanbase argues: Some about why they would rather see it be faithful to the character they grew up with, some about the importance of diversity in movies)
Step 6: Marketing machine reaches a fever pitch; articles everywhere online about how courageous the remake is and how it's going to be a hit, "shutting down" all the Racist Trolls.
(The fanbase just gets tired and goes "okay, sure", then fucks off)
Step 7: Release the remake to all kinds of "acclaim" from astroturfed sources: Website fluff pieces, etc. Bonus points if you can get Rottentomatoes to delete any negative reviews.
Step 8: Remake totally bombs at the box office and hardly anyone goes to see it. Makes 5-10 million, or maybe it loses money altogether.
Step 9: Have the producers go on Twitter and blame "toxic white men" and a "culture of racism" for the failure of the remake. Articles everywhere about how the movie failed because our society is racist and won't accept black women.
(No one cares anymore)
Step 10: Wait a month, then start over at Step 1.
 
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Hatorade

A nice asshole.
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Nothing gets made without money... do you imagine they spent all that money as some kind of charitable donation?

You know they *make* money off this stuff, right?

Now where do you imagine they get that money? You might ponder this while watching them gangrape your childhood memories.

So much shit gets made “that loses millions in the box office” do you really think the people in charge give a fuck about that? They already made their money…
Also you all post up here like this movie is for you… There is an entire generation that hasn’t watched a second of Ninja Turtles, that is who they are aiming at.
Go watch the first two turtle sequels and try not to shit on them, they are terrible… but as kids we ate that shit up. Same thing here, kids have no taste.
 

Aldarion

Egg Nazi
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Completely disingenuous.

Previous movie adaptations were terrible for quality reasons. Basically failures of execution. There was no society wide initiative to make turtles have human teeth; it was just bad execution.

There is on the other hand a society wide initiative to replace all hot redheads with fugly ghetto chicks.

These are not the same.
 

Nirgon

YOU HAVE NO POWER HERE
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Seth Rogan the turbo juice

Love how he can make a scene like he did and still get hired
 

Intrinsic

Person of Whiteness
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You don't watch what we do in the shadows? Shame

I watched the movie and the first season but apparently didn't retain much about the cast. Ohhh... Natasia, now I see. Yeah, totally didn't remember that. Good reminder!
 

Hatorade

A nice asshole.
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Completely disingenuous.

Previous movie adaptations were terrible for quality reasons. Basically failures of execution. There was no society wide initiative to make turtles have human teeth; it was just bad execution.

There is on the other hand a society wide initiative to replace all hot redheads with fugly ghetto chicks.

These are not the same.
Pretty sure mirage comics had her as a black women but don't care that much to look into it. Was any of the live action Aprils even a red head? But yes keep on raging about what society has become on some forums few people care about...that will change things. Because this is all my fault I gonna buy movie tickets now and not go just for you...
 
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Homsar

Bronze Baronet of the Realm
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Will watch to support my boy Jackie. But certainly wont pay for it.
Jackie Chan is perfect for splinter. But the whole movie is a big nope for me.

The voice casting looks like shit not because of race but they just hired kids and it sounds like shit. Give me Pamala Adlon or Scott Grimes at least
 
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Rajaah

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Pretty sure mirage comics had her as a black women but don't care that much to look into it.

I think so. There were a few articles on the usual cheerleader sites about how happy everyone is that April has "gone back to normal" basically by reverting to how she looked in the original comic strip in the 1960's or whenever it was. ...The comic that I didn't know about and I don't think anybody knew about until like the past month. Yes, I'm sure everyone is thrilled that she's "back to normal", cheerleader sites.

For 99% of TMNT fans there's one April we all know and like. Even the Bay movies messed up by having April look nothing like April. Telling you, there's some Hollywood antipathy toward redheads and I don't know why or what it is. Highest profile Hollywood redhead in a movie I can think of was Ron Weasley in the Harry Potter movies, and he was a sidekick whose name was "Weasley"

::goes back to playing Shredder's Revenge and beating Foot Soldier ass with the actual April::
 

Gavinmad

Mr. Poopybutthole
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Was any of the live action Aprils even a red head
Judith Hoag is a redhead, just not a cartoonishly vibrant red and the awful perm they gave her didn't really help either. Paige Turco is somewhere between Auburn and Brunette, so there's at least a vague suggestion of red.

Don't make excuses, just admit you don't care about the slow destruction of your race.
 
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Goatface

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eric july covered April being white, don't know if any other talking points have popped up afterwards about it.
 
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TomServo

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Pretty sure mirage comics had her as a black women but don't care that much to look into it. Was any of the live action Aprils even a red head? But yes keep on raging about what society has become on some forums few people care about...that will change things. Because this is all my fault I gonna buy movie tickets now and not go just for you...
Do you share a account with chaos and tarrant? It's weird this seems to be some sort of troll. Cause I don't remember you being such an idiot.
 

Hatorade

A nice asshole.
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Do you share a account with chaos and tarrant? It's weird this seems to be some sort of troll. Cause I don't remember you being such an idiot.
Gonna buy 4 tickets now...that will show em.
Judith Hoag is a redhead, just not a cartoonishly vibrant red and the awful perm they gave her didn't really help either. Paige Turco is somewhere between Auburn and Brunette, so there's at least a vague suggestion of red.

Don't make excuses, just admit you don't care about the slow destruction of your race.
Correct, I don't give a fuck. Even married outside my race so my kid is only half white.
Doing My Part Reaction GIF
 
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Malakriss

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All your fan fiction of how these decisions supposedly get made are ignoring the simple "problem" they wanted to solve. Big breasted college+ redheads get rule 34ed. Teenagers do not. Unappealing and ugly versions do not. Once they hit that anti-34 design point then they hand it off to the panderers and activists. Make something that can't be sexualized is the foundation, agendas get built on top of that.
 

Gavinmad

Mr. Poopybutthole
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All your fan fiction of how these decisions supposedly get made are ignoring the simple "problem" they wanted to solve. Big breasted college+ redheads get rule 34ed. Teenagers do not. Unappealing and ugly versions do not. Once they hit that anti-34 design point then they hand it off to the panderers and activists. Make something that can't be sexualized is the foundation, agendas get built on top of that.
Yeah this is bullshit but thank you for the tacit admission that black women are ugly.
 
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Xevy

Log Wizard
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Weird that this children's movie is being isn't being made for 55 year old's who want to jack it to a cartoon lady.
 
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