Whats rustling your jimmies?

Amex never sent me a new card since mine expired, I get locked out of my account online because I never got my new one and they cant help me on the phone unless I have my new card, stupid shit.

Kreugen said:

Being locked out from a banking site because it asked security questions that had nothing to do with the ones I had set.

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That happened to me years ago. I was trying to do a password recovery and the question before it would allow me to enter my email was "Where was your honeymoon?"

I've never been married.

The title of this thread

Lowe's and Home Depot having so many goddamned Handicap parking spots

Those people aren't building a deck or remodeling their own bathroom

For christ's sake, those two stores have more handicapped parking than anywhere I've ever seen in my life, and it's the primo 1 row thats right between both the entrance and the exit

Those are for all the retired contractors that will spend the rest of their lives doing off the books handyman work to pay for their surgeries and physical therapy.

I think you mean they are for people on disability who still work full time, but only cash-paying jobs, so they can work the system.

People around here act like they've won the lottery when they get approved for federal disability.

Mother calls me, "I got a virus on my computer"

Jimmies rising

I say, "I installed Noscript on your computer for a reason. Stop whitelisting every website."

"Oh I stopped using Firefox because it was too hard to use. I'm using Chrome now."

(*&%^@#)$(&*^(@*!$!@#%

People who think every word I type is directed at them then whine for days why am I being mean while those I did mean continue in their self centred life oblivious

Went to see Jim Jefferies last night. About half an hour in to his set, 4 people roll in late, and of course they're sitting beside us. One older Lebanese looking dude wearing a pink blazer, with long greasy hair. Other dude is a younger looking Asian of some sort, wearing a white blazer and a bow tie. Two chicks are mid 30's sluts trying desperately to hold on to their 20's. My guess would be that the older dude owns a bar/restaurant or two, the Asian is one of his managers/cooks/DJ's or some shit, and the two chicks are servers that they're fucking. They just had that bar/restaurant industry look and attitude.

Me and the three guys I'm with stand up to let them by. They stop before their seats, standing in front of us, and start talking among themselves about what seat numbers they have and where to sit. You can hear people murmuring behind us, not amused that their view is being blocked right in the middle of a bit. I say "get in your seats, assholes". That gets them in their seats, but the older dude who ends up sitting beside me is muttering about me being the asshole and who the fuck do I think I am etc. I just ignore it and try to go back to watching the show.

The four of them proceed to chit chat among themselves for the entire fucking set. The whole time. People in front and behind them also tell them to shut the fuck up, but they just keep on talking. I can hear them periodically talking shit about me, and I just try my best to ignore it and enjoy the show. They're also pulling out their phones to text and shit, which is also pretty fucking annoying, as the old guy has a fucking Note on full brightness. One of the guys I was there with a couple seats over leans over and tells him to put his fucking phone away. Later the chicks were fucking around with their phones, and again people behind them told them to put them the fuck away.

Within 20 minutes of getting to their seats, the two cunts get up to go to the washroom, so we all have to stand up again to let them by. 5 minutes after they come back, the Asian dude gets up to go to the washroom, and again we have to get up to let them by. When he comes back, he basically stops directly in front of me, and stares me down for 5-10 seconds. At that point I'm like "are you seriously staring me down, you fucking asshole? Everyone around here is sick of you and your friend's shit, you self centered cunt. Get the fuck back in your seat." At that point someone who's sitting a bit further away and probably wasn't aware of all the shit going on tells us all to shut the fuck up, which is fair. Dude goes back to his seat, but for the rest of the show I can see him out of the corner of my eye staring me down.

Jefferies makes it very clear his set is coming to an end because there's another show immediately after (he went for a good two hours). So naturally the older guy decides that's a great time to also get up and go to the bathroom. As I start to stand up, he sarcastically says excuse me and more or less intentionally elbows me as he goes past, although not hard or anything. Again, I'm just trying to find my happy place and resisting the urge to smash his fucking hipster glasses in to his face.

The show ended without further incident, as the old dude just waited in the lobby for his friends instead of coming back to his seat. He also gave me a stare down as I walked by. I just smiled at him.

So after the show we went to a bar a few blocks away. Half a dozen people recognized me as they were sitting behind us, and came up to me to shake my hand and thank me for telling them off. One dude laughed and said that if anything shit had started, he was ready to come over the top with a flying elbow. Made me feel better, as I thought maybe I was the asshole in the situation, given that I'd maybe been a bit aggressive initially when I told them to hurry the fuck up and sit down.

Jimmies were incredibly rustled. Like, the most they've been rustled in years. Wish I'd looked over the old dude's shoulder a bit more at his phone so I could figure out who he was and burn his fucking house and/or restaurant down.

The main reason for ADA stalls isn't proximity to the store entrance. It's the size of the stall so that if they have a van with a ramp on the side, they can get out of their vehicle. And you may as well put them up front if you're going to have special stalls. And the number is arrived at from a calculation based on the store's square footage, which will dictate how many stalls in total are needed, and then the number of ADA stalls is derived from that. Big stores are going to have a fair number of ADA stalls.

The fact that this rustles your jimmies is a pretty strong indication that you're a fucking asshole. God forbid your able bodied ass has to walk an extra 25 feet.

Big Phoenix said:

Should of got Jim to go off on them.

Handicap parking is one of the dumbest fucking things in our country. Fucking shitty ass retarded ADA fucking over every single american so the .000000001% can have a slightly more enjoyable life. Like why the fuck do they have handicap parking at places like that or malls? Especially malls were you can end up walking a mile or two while in one easily if not more, so what fucking difference does it make that your parking space was 100 feet closer? Fuck all.

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There are plenty of people that can walk around an air conditioned building just fine but having to hike in from bfe in the heat could seriously affect them. In short, you're an asshole who deserves to get fucked in the ass until you're disabled.