Why do men keep putting me in the Girlfriend-zone?

Tanoomba_sl said:

There you go, you simply don't understand it.

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You're right, I don't. I literally can't process it from a logical point of view. They literally offer nothing that appeals to any of my interests, what I find engaging, what I find fun, etc., from a friendship standpoint. And the only men I know thatdofind women engaging, fun, unique, etc. are either homosexual, bisexual, or emotionally needy as fuck.

Personally, while I'm sure your post is simply meant to express your point of view, it also encapsulates much of what feminism stands against.

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Oh, fuck. Please tell me you aren't one of these men who believe women are so horribly downtrodden and misunderstood.

You can't imagine connecting with women on a social/interests level even though women have their own views, opinions, interests, dreams, ideas, and passions, any (or even several) of which you just might happen to share.

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Actually, I don't. The one woman I've met that does happen to share some of these interests and world views, happens to be my girlfriend. However, she's still a woman and there are still plenty of things that I just can't "connect" with her on.

"The things women eventually end up sneaking into conversations"... What does this mean? Honestly, I can't even guess. I'm friends with many women and there is nothing they all "sneak into conversations". What do you mean, like shoe shopping or something? Please clarify.

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Pretty much. "Look at those shoes! Can you believe she'd wear those with that outfit!?" "Oh, man! That wedding dress is so hideous!". And then there is all the emotional baggage and such that they like talking about as well.

And what do you mean, "that wouldn't be better served by getting through a male"? You make it sound like having a female friend is a compromise somehow. My female friends are each unique individuals who I interact with in completely different ways and under completely different circumstances, and what I get from every single one of them would most certainly not be "better served getting through a male".

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The only thing I can really see getting through a female friendship that you can't get through a male friendship is female "perspective". Which is usually only useful for dating/nailing other chicks. The problem is, even the perspective and advice women give on that is wrong and not what they really want/look for. Like the saying goes, "What a woman thinks she wants, what she says she wants, and what sheactuallywants, are at least 7 different things".

Perhaps this "emotional neediness" you perceive is due more to your own issues than it is to any characteristic inherent to the female gender?

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Perhaps. Maybe that is the case. I'm not saying females are wrong or have issues. We are wired differently, I get that. But I realize that most women treat this life as one big hierarchy(especiallyamongst their own social circle) that they have to claw and bite their way to the top of. They'll sell you out in a heartbeat. The vast, vast majority of them know almost nothing of loyalty, honesty, integrity, etc. and would sell you out the minute they thought they could gain position on the social ladder. They swing from "rung to rung" all the time. You see it constantly with women who cheat on their boyfriends, husbands, etc., but wait to tell them/leave until they have a solid grasp on the next rung up(or at least what they perceive as the next rung, even if that ends up not being true down the road). That is not a personality type that I necessarily want or enjoy having as a true, genuine, solid, life-long friendship(men possess this personality as well, though it doesn't seem to be as prevalent).

Tanoomba_sl said:

This says more to me than everything else put together. You don't trust women, you believe them to be liars and cheats.
I'm sure women exist who fit the criteria you describe to a T. I'm equally sure just as many (if not, realistically, many many more) men fit that criteria just as well. After all, the lying, cheating, cutthroat worlds of politics and big business are still primarily controlled by men. I know you're trying to tell me this is all based on your observations, but I find it hard to believe these observations aren't tainted somehow. Maybe you've had bad experiences? Maybe a girl (or girls) broke your heart, got you fired, broke your XBox, etc? I dunno, but of all the girls in my life (family, friends, co-workers, classmates, acquaintances, etc) I don't know any who would "sell me out in a heartbeat". I'm not saying they're all angels, they are just as flawed as the men I know, but their flaws do not stem from them being female, and it benefits no-one to make the point that they do.

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That's because they have no "need" to sell you out. You're giving them all they need emotionally. Physically they aren't attracted to you because you're a "feminist". If you have as many female friends as you claim to have, yet weren't so enthralled by feminism, pretty much all of the single women you are friends with would become home wreckers(even some of the not-single ones), given the first opportunity. The fact that you're married is just a bigger challenge to them. They love that shit. They live for it.

Well my wife is a nerd and my best friend, besides being my wife. Maybe you guys marry poofta women you can showboat around to friends and such, but I like being able to do nerd shit with my wife. I like that we argue over who gets to play the next fallout installment first. Treat a woman like a trophy and she will be about as loyal (and useful) as one, I guess is the message.

Of course, for there to be any real chance at being friends with a woman she has to be well past the crazy stage and generally not clam jockeying against other women all the time, so I can understand why a lot of you don't see it happening. Women really are often shallow materialistic vapid cunts, but a lot of guys are cocks with a set of car keys too. The older you get (assuming you ever settle down) and the less your dick rules your life, the more likely you are to have female friends you see as something other than a sperm receptacle. The older and less crazy women get, the more likely women are to have male friends that they see as something other than tools to use or potential baby mamas.

I would wager that any dude who does not trust his wife around other guys probably is not at that point and definitely has some trust issues. Same goes for women.

Phazael_sl said:

Women really are often shallow materialistic vapid cunts, but a lot of guys are cocks with a set of car keys too. The older you get (assuming you ever settle down) and the less your dick rules your life, the more likely you are to have female friends you see as something other than a sperm receptacle. The older and less crazy women get, the more likely women are to have male friends that they see as something other than tools to use or potential baby mamas.

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I'd agree with this. It just tends to be far more prevalent in women, from my experiences. Women tend to need the "calming" factor of marriage and/or children before they settle that shit down as well.

And it is easier to have female friends you are not married to once you are married and settled down. The two concepts are not mutually exclusive. If you are a single male (especially one of those forever alone guys), then yeah, having platonic female friends who are not using you is unlikely.