X-Men: Dark Phoenix (2019)
- Thread starter pharmakos
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I just watched this movie, and while it's no masterpiece, it's not awful. I was expecting total trash from beginning to end based on this thread and instead it's just generically bad. Somehow they forgot Phoenix sorta evolving/appearing at the end of Apocalypse and made a new, much worse origin story. That was my biggest complaint other than the continuous shitting on Cyclops as a character, but that seems to be a feature of the X-Men movies and not unique to this. As an X-Men this is probably a 4/10, but if they just made this same movie totally unrelated to that universe you could probably bump it up to 5. Bad yes, but not total garbage. Completely forgettable if it wasn't ruining a beloved franchise
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Sanrith Descartes
Veteran of a thousand threadban wars
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So bad acting, bad writing, virtue signaling and a total reimagining of the Dark Phoenix doesnt qualify as trash, just generic bad? What raised it up for you? The costumes and editing? The musical score?
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Bondurant
Ahn'Qiraj Raider
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In a multimillion movie production there's absolutely no way that, at some remote point, people in charge saw Sophie Turner makeup and thought "that's exactly like a 90' girl looks like". It's not bad taste, it's not an oversight, it's not even bad production, it's an industrial catastrophe.
Abysmal writing by some TV show yesmen, actors doing reshoots because they can't fucking act, production going over budget because managing schedules is quantum science and producing your movie no one wants to see is 101 development hell.
Dark phoenix is a total disaster, you just gotta deal with it.
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Sanrith Descartes
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I remember reading the Phoenix Saga when it came out. Jean piloting the shuttle so the team could live. It was good stuff. The aliens showing up, the Imperial Guard (aka the Legion of Superheroes) and the fight on the moon. The shit was good. And these asshats somehow believed the garbage they wrote was better? Sometimes the best answer is to admit someone did a great job and you just touch it up to fit the medium and pay it the homage.
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Sanrith Descartes
Veteran of a thousand threadban wars
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Yep. Cant write around him. They should have killed him in DoFP. Marvel understood this.
Gavinmad
Mr. Poopybutthole
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The irony being that Marvel was wrong because the powerlevel of their Quicksilver was fine when measured against the rest of the heroes.
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Gavinmad
Mr. Poopybutthole
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So the Honest Trailer for this abortion is out and it drives home a point that I somehow missed. The writer for Last Stand is both writer AND director for Dark Phoenix. Like what the fuck? Last Stand tanked the franchise so goddamn hard that it took a time traveling pre-sequel to (ever so briefly) get the series back on track, and you not only let that guy write a Phoenix movie AGAIN, you let him direct as well? That's gotta be one of the biggest fail-upwards in the history of failing upwards.
I can't wait til Disney restarts the X-Men, brings us a bit of hope, then tanks the franchise yet again with another terrible attempt at Dark Phoenix. I mean jesus christ there are plenty of iconic X-Men storylines. How about an entire series set in the Age of Apocalypse? Re-imagine the Messiah storyline? Hell even turning the story of Wolverine and the X-Men into a couple movies could be pretty interesting.
I can't wait til Disney restarts the X-Men, brings us a bit of hope, then tanks the franchise yet again with another terrible attempt at Dark Phoenix. I mean jesus christ there are plenty of iconic X-Men storylines. How about an entire series set in the Age of Apocalypse? Re-imagine the Messiah storyline? Hell even turning the story of Wolverine and the X-Men into a couple movies could be pretty interesting.
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spronk
FPS noob
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Kinsberg also wrote Days of Future Past. He also wrote Apocalypse, Fantastic Four (the 2015 one that no one saw and is considered one of the worst superhero movies ever). By all accounts the big reason he keeps failing upwards is that he is super easy and great to work with for actors, so they all lobby hard for him and studios like Fox or Sony don't give a fuck.
Gavinmad
Mr. Poopybutthole
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Huh. I guess the most important part of successful X-Men movies is a creepy pedo director then.
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Ishad
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Void
Experiencer
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I'm assuming you are talking about the scene in the jungle. Jean is using her telekinesis to try to push it away (and probably kill everyone aboard), Magneto is using his magnetism powers to try to resist her push (and save the people). He's not just holding it in place against its own power, Jean is actively pushing with her Phoenix-force augmented powers. That's why he's having an issue, not because he forgot how to move metallic objects.
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Gavinmad
Mr. Poopybutthole
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This is pretty funny too. The Screen Junkies folks sitting around creeping through the Honest Trailer as they relentlessly rag on the movie, and they can't stop laughing as they do it because the movie was just so awful. One dude is so salty that he says 'this movie is terrible' almost every single time they unpause the trailer.
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a c i d.f l y
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I especially liked the part where they dissected the stupid "x-women" joke, how fucking useless Mystique being in the movie, and how humanity just "forgave" her. There's some monstrous logical fallacies that I just ignored when I watched it. I expected it to be absolutely bonkers bad, but it was just regular bad.
Attog
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Still a better X-Men movie than the one with the blue Egyptian guy and the one with Ryan Reynolds where he had his mouth sewn shut.
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