X-Men: Dark Phoenix (2019)

Aychamo BanBan

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first 20 mins is pretty good, then 20 mins of starting to suck, then 30 mins of full on double fist shafting, then 45 minutes of piranha teeth syphilis infested boils-on-tongue-hooker with super-aids suckapocalypse.

just watch the first 20 mins at home and then turn it off and make up the rest of the movie in your head, it'll be infinitely better

one thing maybe someone can answer: why don't the governments of the world hunt down and exterminate every mutant at the end of this movie? Thats what the entire movie sets up and offers absolutely no reason why it wouldn't happen.

LMFAO at this description. I love it.
 
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Qhue

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I was going to hold off on this until home release, but a local showing was completely empty** yesterday when we were at the mall so we jumped in to hate-watch it as a group.

The movie was a lot of fun to rip on MST3K style, especially with a bunch of comic fans, and so it had quite a lot of entertainment value as a result but clearly this was not their intent.


** having a completely empty showing one week after release is really bad. I almost felt bad for the theater since they had several screens dedicated to this still.
 

Goatface

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early reports had it breaking records for largest drop 2nd Friday, but appears it picked up for the weekend
if -73% holds out, will be 58th worse drop 2nd weekend in history
Movie Gross ChangeThtrs.Per Thtr.Total GrossWeek
4(2)Dark Phoenix$9,005,000-73%3,721$2,420 $51,767,3502
 

Chukzombi

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early reports had it breaking records for largest drop 2nd Friday, but appears it picked up for the weekend
if -73% holds out, will be 58th worse drop 2nd weekend in history

Movie Gross ChangeThtrs.Per Thtr.Total GrossWeek


4(2)Dark Phoenix$9,005,000-73%3,721$2,420 $51,767,3502
maybe it had a little help, MIB 4 was so bad they went to see Dark Sansa instead.
MiB 4 only 28m opening weekend. amd Shaft with Samuel L Jackson only did 8m.
 

jayrebb

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I was going to hold off on this until home release, but a local showing was completely empty** yesterday when we were at the mall so we jumped in to hate-watch it as a group.

The movie was a lot of fun to rip on MST3K style, especially with a bunch of comic fans, and so it had quite a lot of entertainment value as a result but clearly this was not their intent.


** having a completely empty showing one week after release is really bad. I almost felt bad for the theater since they had several screens dedicated to this still.

I'd do the same. If the theater is empty, I'm not passing that up.

Yeah, I'd even violate my "no money for star wars" promise that I've upheld since paying for TFA if I walked by an empty theater and Episode 9 was playing.
 

spronk

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BoxOfficeMojo said:
Finishing outside the top five we find WB's release of Shaft, which the studio was expecting to debut somewhere around $15 million, but it could only muster an estimated $8.3 million from 2,952 locations. That said, while critical response was mixed-to-negative, opening day audiences gave the film an "A" CinemaScore, though with an opening this low the film's fate is most likely sealed. Additionally, the film played to a crowd that was 54% female and 84% of the overall audience came in aged 25 years or older.

hehehehe all the women wanted some shaft hehehehe

C0lZhxZ.jpg
 
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Haus

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Unfortunately it probably hurts Hemsworth more than her. He's the bigger star and will get more of the blame.

Lest we not forget this is not the first time he's been tained with the 'Grrl pwwr' angle.. *cough*Ghostbusters*cough*

Should we entertain the hypotheses that Thor is a Soy Boy?
 
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Goatface

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Shaft's estimated budget is only $30m, would think they will make that back with ease with VoD sales
 
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Qhue

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With Avengers kicking things off very early it has felt like the entire typical 'summer' movie season was dead by the traditional start. My local crew are movie geeks (including but not limited to making short films) and normally the summer has us going every weekend to the cinema , but not this year. I am hoping that people do see Spiderman on July 4th, but who knows.
 

Angerz

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Lest we not forget this is not the first time he's been tained with the 'Grrl pwwr' angle.. *cough*Ghostbusters*cough*

Should we entertain the hypotheses that Thor is a Soy Boy?

I don't think he came off that bad from Ghostbusters, and probably benifited from it. He was the only thing funny in that movie and it really showcased his comedic chops.
 
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Aychamo BanBan

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Oh god. This is so bad and I'm only 22 minutes in. The space rescue scene was so stupid, starting with Cyclops shooting a beam out of their ship, in space, then he hits the shuttle in the direction it's spinning out of control which makes it slow down (yes I know he hit the thruster, but his explosion would make it spin worse, not stop spinning). Then fucking Jennifer Lawrence with the "the women are saving the men, should call it X-woman!" YUCK. Complete dumpster fire so far.
 
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Aychamo BanBan

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Someone wrote that the movie gets exponentially worse every 20 minutes. I had to finish it to see if this is the case, and by god, it is. Wow, it's honestly amazing something this bad could get made. I have nothing else to say. I just want it to disappear from my brain, like that Nic Cage movie "Knowing" did until just right now.
 
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Haus

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My wife has been reading a lot of articles about it. Apparently they made them reshoot and edit a ton of crap in it during the Disney/Fox acquisition because Disney side Marvel was upset about elements which conflicted with some of what they were doing. Apparently those aliens were originally Skrulls.
 

Aychamo BanBan

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My wife has been reading a lot of articles about it. Apparently they made them reshoot and edit a ton of crap in it during the Disney/Fox acquisition because Disney side Marvel was upset about elements which conflicted with some of what they were doing. Apparently those aliens were originally Skrulls.

Interesting! That would have been one way to start integrating the different universes. Does that mean that we shouldn't expect any X-men in the Avengers movies ever?
 

Haus

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Interesting! That would have been one way to start integrating the different universes. Does that mean that we shouldn't expect any X-men in the Avengers movies ever?

The general current concensus is they want people to forget about these x-men movies. WHich means no x-men probably for at least 5-6 years.
 
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Tarisk

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Someone wrote that the movie gets exponentially worse every 20 minutes. I had to finish it to see if this is the case, and by god, it is. Wow, it's honestly amazing something this bad could get made. I have nothing else to say. I just want it to disappear from my brain, like that Nic Cage movie "Knowing" did until just right now.

Don't bring Knowing into this.
 
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Lanx

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Interesting! That would have been one way to start integrating the different universes. Does that mean that we shouldn't expect any X-men in the Avengers movies ever?
something like, marvel and fox have a handshake deal of the "race" of skrulls is shared (but klrt super skrull is fox only).

this was all pre-aquisition, now that marvel has control of the rights and dark-phoenix, they didn't want the skrulls to muddy the waters in xmen and only to appear in captain marvel, so they sacrified the this garbage since captain marvel is gonna be the flagship heroine in MCU.
 
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