You know you're getting old when.....

Sanrith Descartes

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I have been doing the poop lab test for years. As long as the test comes back clean (no pun intended), no camera for me says the doc.
 

Lanx

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Even if I'd slept 4 hours a night for two weeks in a row, I'd still be up at 8am on a Saturday, laying in bed, wishing I could sleep another half day, even if I don't actually crawl out of bed until noon...
Take two benadryl and call me at high noon, also the offbrand is called Diphenhydramine and it breaks down to a penny a pill.
 

Haus

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The benadryl hangover is worse than not sleeping.

If you have trouble with Benadryl, try out Doxylamine Succinate (I believe this was the original unisom and it's in a lot of nighttime cold stuff) That coupled with a 10mg Melatonin works well when I need to get solid sleep. I used to be a 2 Benadryl a night guy, but also too much Diphenhydramine can screw with your system over time.
 

Haus

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Got that stuff, too. Same results, though I do sleep.

For me it was working a night shift job for almost a decade and needing to jackboot my sleep cycles to fit. Took almost 2 years after before I could effectively sleep without chemical assistance.
 
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Void

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I'm looking at the finger/camera/poop smear next year. My old doctor went into sports medicine so I'm thinking I should make the move to the hot MILF in the office with some random ailment before jumping right to asking her to give me a prostate massage.

Another thing that always makes me feel old is singing along with Winger's "Seventeen" when it comes on Hair Nation in the car. It's a lot more creepy if anyone sees me now than it used to be.
 
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Aaron

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No, you need to go up to that MILF and have the very fist thing you say to her be: "I need your finger in my poop shoot!" while staring her in the eyes. If she finds that disturbing, she should have chosen a different career.
 
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latheboy

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I turned 40 last year and my wife was on my case about getting a medical.. Nar I in peak form, strong fit what could possibly go wrong?? Days later I'm shitting blood, like pouring.. Not into butt stuff so it something bad .. Freak out and go to the doc. Finger up butt.. Poo on a stick etc .. Nar you're all good mate there's nothing wrong.. You are healthy as bro. wtf body was just keeping me in check. At least I got to brag to the wife that I'm a perfect specimen
 

Hoss

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I'm sure your wife did it to you. Women have ways of making that shit happen.
 

Aamry

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I turned 40 last year and my wife was on my case about getting a medical.. Nar I in peak form, strong fit what could possibly go wrong?? Days later I'm shitting blood, like pouring.. Not into butt stuff so it something bad .. Freak out and go to the doc. Finger up butt.. Poo on a stick etc .. Nar you're all good mate there's nothing wrong.. You are healthy as bro. wtf body was just keeping me in check. At least I got to brag to the wife that I'm a perfect specimen

Didn't eat something weird, like beets?
 

latheboy

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It was over a year ago, i've drank way too much since then to remember what i ate haha.
And i'm still feeling good so the dosage must still be too low, she's a Nurse so she would know how much is just enough.

Never happen again so i'll just pretend it never happened.
 

Lanx

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i'm telling you old fucks(like myself) get a bidet then you won't have to worry about weird butt stuff. It's also great if you're on carnivore/keto limited fiber diet. If you're feeling constipated and just can't dump your shit, turn on the bidet, and basically give yourself an enema. You do it for a minute and your constipated ass will just unfurl satans vomit. The only downside really is this of course causes splash back so along w/ taking a shower and washing your ass you really have to tidy up the bowl.

When i was a young buck, i laughed at ppl w/ toilet stories, now i always eat some fucking fiber everyday so shit just comes out.
 
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Aaron

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God, we are getting old in here, aren't we? lol.

It was just a few years ago I was driving my co-workers crazy (well, mostly the women) by telling them how awesome of a digestive/metabolic system I had. I could stuff any amount of crap in my mouth and I'd still be fit as a fiddle and lean. Fast forward a couple of years and dairy gives me the shits, wheat makes me fall asleep, and I've had to start taking pills due to some fucked up stomach chemistry.

Can't wait for a decade or two until we're bitching about hip replacements and shit lol. God I love this thread.
 
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Izo

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God, we are getting old in here, aren't we? lol.

It was just a few years ago I was driving my co-workers crazy (well, mostly the women) by telling them how awesome of a digestive/metabolic system I had. I could stuff any amount of crap in my mouth and I'd still be fit as a fiddle and lean. Fast forward a couple of years and dairy gives me the shits, wheat makes me fall asleep, and I've had to start taking pills due to some fucked up stomach chemistry.

Can't wait for a decade or two until we're bitching about hip replacements and shit lol. God I love this thread.
Time to get that a1c checked.
 

Hoss

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Is that all you have to contribute to this thread? "You better get the most basic common blood tests done cuz u got Diabetes"
 
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Fogel

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Have you seen the other threads he's been posting in? It could be worse...
 
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Wantonsoup95

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When the desire to get something as a new release is completely gone, if it ain't on sale for less than 20 bucks the media ain't worth owning. No grey hair yet though!
 
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