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Nice work, man! That's a serious upgrade. Cabinets look great, counter top suits the space, floor matches great. The GFCI upgrade is such a good idea, too. Did you replace the window, or just clean it up?

McDonald's Canada marking 50th birthday with 67-cent hamburgers

That's good work. So fussy and time consuming I think I would have gone insane.

Sounds like a good Friday night.

Really happy for you, man.

Oh, yes. I need to knock them knockers around a bit I reckon.

My wife's further testing shows she just has dense breast tissue. Her doctor said she has "busy boobs." There's nothing to be concerned about now, but mammograms every six months instead of a year is recommended. So glad!

Deeply retarded?

I'm not sure if that's deep or retarded.

There is specific silicon for wide gap, shouldn't be hard to find. Edit: everyone should see this skit from SNL about caulk.

Just use a good amount of silicone, should be good.

I'm going to stay in this house until I die, likely. So I'm going to make it as awesome as possible. Additionally, my cedar siding is starting to show its 40 years. Sections of it are going to have to be replaced anyway.

The trouble is, she's going to have a voice like Fran Drescher.

I've just replaced three windows in my kitchen and found out that sections of my house don't have house wrap on it. I've flashed and wrapped the dickens out of it, and now I plan to declad my entire house of cedar siding next summer (it's about half brick), wrapping it, and putting up new...

My middle child is just starting high school, and tonight she made the varsity soccer team. Her two older sisters are also on the varsity team. You should have seen her tonight, she was a fucking beast in both the middle and back field. She's not tall, but she outran every single person on the...

This is so true, and it's even worse when you're at a friends house and the dude says "And here's my wife's tiramisu (or whatever). It's so good, everyone asks for the recipe!" And then it tastes like a filthy ass, and you have to choke it down to not offend. I've learned that saying "your...

This is forward thinking. Genius.

I've had some pretty shitty tiramisu, actually. Essentially had the consistency of wet bread. Everything's a risk, man.

There is a place here that makes cannolis that are so good I get a semi while eating them. Good cannolis with good esspresso and good mineral water is the afternoon snack of the gods.

Don't mess around with pressure washers and get the wimpy ones. Here's what I recommend: Mi-T-M HSP-3504-3MGH Hot Pressure Washer with Electric Start - Patriot Contractors Equipment But, if you don't have $4,300 I would recommend something like this: Simpson MegaShot 3,100 psi 2.5 GPM Gas...

I fly at least weekly, and the stress of it wears off pretty quickly. I'm guessing if you force yourself to do it a few times you will lose the largest portion of your fear. Man up, do it, and you'll get through it.

It's a good job, dude. Really made it look sharp.

If my phone dings while I'm driving, I hand it to my wife so she can tell me who is texting. She doesn't read the text, just tells me a name. Same happens when she drives. There is total trust, and no need for secrecy, but if she demanded to read all my texts, I'd be pissed. Not because I have...

Set up an endowment that will pay out for my kids' education costs. Do it right, never have a tuition payment that can't be met. Then, when all education is done, they each get $200,000 toward their first house.

Turn this around. Ask her why she trusts you so little that she feels the need to read private conversations you're having with your friends. Everyone needs private space, even in, and perhaps especially in, a marriage. Trust has to be both directions. Either she trusts you to have conversations...

I've never wanted to be a cushion so badly.

My wife just got the results of her annual mammogram. She has a suspicious cyst that, according to that doctor, requires immediate attention. Fuck, fuck, fuckity fuck.

Plus, it includes the word firm, which is a funny word.

I know exactly what you mean. If I come off as always having my shit sorted, I apologise for a gross misrepresentation. We have plenty of cock-ups here, it's just that my wife and I have more available time than most parents our age. I think that gives the impression that we have everything...

And Russia was involved.

My wife is very much like this. We both are. I think we spend about the same, but when there are major purchases, like appliances or such things, I'm the one pulling the trigger. But for school uniforms and such things, she's pulling the trigger. But for ourselves? We both hate spending money...

Yeah, she doesn't miss you. She misses the stuff you got her.

I like where you're going with this. Please, continue.

Bi-fold doors are an abomination. I want to meet the person who invented them, and slap that person.