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This is the McCheese family:

The amount of makeup being worn on college campuses at any given moment is directly proportional to how close it is to exam week. Closer to exams, less makeup, more yoga/sweat pants, more hairs in ponytails and/or hats. Is there anything equivalent to exam week in marriage when women tend to...

Just looking out for ya, man!

There are several things to consider beyond calories when eating out. It's virtually impossible, for example, to eat many places where the sodium content is low, for example. The chicken nuggets at Chick-Fil-A (8 count) does have only 270 calories, but it also has 1080 mg of sodium. That's...

Tenks seems upset.

Do you do a lot of entertaining?

Not that hard to get through a tomato before it goes bad. Also not hard to buy a head of lettuce for a cheap price, and use it until it goes bad if it does. Or make a salad with it once it starts aging and you're not using it on sandwiches. I think my issue with most sandwiches I buy is...

Looks like it might be more than one person who needs a punch in the face. HeyOOOOOOO!

Or a punch in the face.

There's really nothing coming from the team right now, is there? Are they communicating anything anywhere?

Sure you can. Go to the deli at the store, buy one slice of coldcut if you want to. I don't eat sandwiches every day, but fairly often, and I don't have to throw away food. And it is rare that I buy a sandwich I like as much as what I make at home.

This is roughly 10 days growth for me.

I find it feels very nice on my scrotum.

Never trust a man without a beard. Also, mustache rides are awesome (according to my wife).

So you're down to two whores? That's rough, man.

You people act like you don't have others preparing your fuck partners' assholes with wipes. What are you, savages? No dirty butthole sex for me!

For those just starting out - it still takes me more than a full day to become acclimated to elevation - I feel like shit for the first day. Literally have the shits, similar to mild flu symptoms. After that, totally fine. I used to think it was the nuts in the trail mix to which I was...

While making me a breakfast sandwich.

The best wound dressing is tampon. Bring a couple, you're good to go, and they are very compact. Yes, as a man, I bring tampons on the trail. You got a problem with that?

White sauce pizza?

You should probably seek help regarding your beefy curtain obsession.

He makes a fine point.

I honestly feel very sorry for any women in your life.

That would likely take 30 minutes work with a jackhammer. It's physical work, but not hard to figure out. You'll be able to break it into manageable pieces quickly. The issue is what you do with those pieces. Put some in your weekly garbage for the next 8 weeks is an option. Rent a...

Wolf is code for soygen

To be fair, that is a reasonable assumption when dealing with you. My wife and I have these same issues, just like every couple. I don't work all that much, but when I do, it goes in intense bursts that can be very all-consuming for me, and I just want to crash when I'm not working. My...

Probably some of the most fun hiking I've done is in Southern Utah in the two parks Canyonlands and Arches. Totally different from something like Glacier or Yellowstone, but just amazing. I found it more stunning than the Grand Canyon, to be honest, and totally empty. Not as well known, and...

I think there's probably some kind of cream or ointment that would take care of the blue stuff on your face.

We're going camping/hiking near the Bear Tooth pass in Montana this summer, and I am really looking forward to it. We're not pushing too hard, I think the plan is something like a 19 mile loop over 4 days. That's the second best kind of camping. The best is doing similar trips, but in canoes.

You can, there are particular things to use, but cement counter tops are becoming quite popular, and the products are showing up in more places. Look, for example, at this product from Menards, and all the products that go along with it. Cement counters are awesome...

You watch too much Law and Order.

Can you draw a face on your sack with a sharpie and put a nice hat on your balls to make them more festive?

No one wants that, Dumar.

It would take such a crazy long time, but it is possible. On another note, just tried a test cement counter top. Made up four forms, mixed the cement, and am doing slightly different things in finishing them, seeing what works best, and if this is really a viable option for me when I do my...