Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (2018)
- Thread starter Ravishing
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spronk
FPS noob
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Just got back, 6/10. Average sums up everything about this movie.
They must have injected Jared from Subway DNA into the new dino because that thing was hunting the young girl like she was the last unmolested child on the planet. JW1 must have made most of its money from kids because this movie feels like it was HEAVILY aimed at the 8-12 year old market. I think blue (the velociraptor) had more screen time than Chris Pratt.
Its disappointing because Jurassic Park is pretty much the only dino movie that Hollywood will make, but they tell the most uninteresting stories every time. 8 year old me can't understand how you can tell such boring dinosaur stories.
They must have injected Jared from Subway DNA into the new dino because that thing was hunting the young girl like she was the last unmolested child on the planet. JW1 must have made most of its money from kids because this movie feels like it was HEAVILY aimed at the 8-12 year old market. I think blue (the velociraptor) had more screen time than Chris Pratt.
Its disappointing because Jurassic Park is pretty much the only dino movie that Hollywood will make, but they tell the most uninteresting stories every time. 8 year old me can't understand how you can tell such boring dinosaur stories.
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Jait
Molten Core Raider
- 5,035
- 5,317
I have to go and see this an hour. I used to avoid threads for spoilers. Now I need to avoid them so I don’t dread going.
50/50 there’s someone already in my seats. They’ll act surprised. Pull out their phone and slowly walk away. Happened at Incredibles 2, Force Awakens, Thor Ragnarok.
50/50 there’s someone already in my seats. They’ll act surprised. Pull out their phone and slowly walk away. Happened at Incredibles 2, Force Awakens, Thor Ragnarok.
Yeah that's what happened. Family came in saw the inventors in their chairs talked to them showed them their phones and they didn't move. Mom grabs an usher who asks them for tickets and they leave.
When the movie's over my friend goes to the bathroom while i'm waiting for her a bunch of them start blaring shitty American Inventor music on their boost phones and start twerking in the movie lobby while waiting for their parents to pick them up.
It's the reason why I always try and go to the Theatre that's 20 minutes further but is not on any bus lines and not near any low income housing. Only problem there is it's small but only old people go to it and old people rock for movies.
About the movie, The first act was really a slog and i thought it was going to be the entire movie, the second two picked up the pace and made it passable by the end. I'd give it a 6/10
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Jait
Molten Core Raider
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I cheered and yelled Get em when the dinosaur went after the whiny scientist up the ladder at the start.
Buffalo Bill opening the cage caused a lot of folks to lol.
Seemed really disjointed like they cut a lot for time. Pratt gets tranquilizer and just a few minutes later finds himself surrounded by lava. Same with the race to the ship. No one turned around and noticed the truck jumping into their boat, but they were surrounded by enemies a second later as the car stopped. Just odd stuff.
Was pretty awful but the kids really enjoyed it for some reason. And what the fuck was the little girl plot. So unnecessary. And using Dobby as a Trump lookalike was lame. Bad blonde toupee and teeth.
Edit: Creed 2 trailer was awesome.
Edit2: Rex Reed panned it but this is actually funny.
For the Love of God, Will Someone Put ‘Jurassic World’ Out of Its Misery?
Uh...it’s phlebotomy, Rex.
Buffalo Bill opening the cage caused a lot of folks to lol.
Seemed really disjointed like they cut a lot for time. Pratt gets tranquilizer and just a few minutes later finds himself surrounded by lava. Same with the race to the ship. No one turned around and noticed the truck jumping into their boat, but they were surrounded by enemies a second later as the car stopped. Just odd stuff.
Was pretty awful but the kids really enjoyed it for some reason. And what the fuck was the little girl plot. So unnecessary. And using Dobby as a Trump lookalike was lame. Bad blonde toupee and teeth.
Edit: Creed 2 trailer was awesome.
Edit2: Rex Reed panned it but this is actually funny.
For the Love of God, Will Someone Put ‘Jurassic World’ Out of Its Misery?
Uh...it’s phlebotomy, Rex.
Last edited:
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Namon
Blackwing Lair Raider
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I didn't hate it, is about all I can say. It was kind of boring and I think the whole greedy employee who looks to sell dino technology to the highest bidder plot wore out it's welcome in the 1st movie, and yet, here we are 5 movies later. But that didn't matter actually as the action drove it enough to make the plot not really matter. In this one they make the mistake of trying to focus on the plot more, and it suffered for it.
Cybsled
Avatar of War Slayer
- 16,451
- 12,097
Based on interviews, it sounds like they want the 3rd movie to explore "open source" technology. Basically, the tech to make the dinos has been released into the world, so now various countries will use it to their own ends.
Please be dinorider army battles!
Please be dinorider army battles!
Big Phoenix
Pronouns: zie/zhem/zer
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Namon
Blackwing Lair Raider
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I got kids and a wife who loves them. Grossly out numbered on that one
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ShakyJake
<Donor>
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Looks like she has toned up quite a bit. Last time I saw her she looked pretty chunky.hate the movie all you want, but godddddaaaaamn bryce dallas howard (ron howard's daughter no less) has some fine ass titties
DickTrickle
Definitely NOT Furor Planedefiler
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Izo
Tranny Chaser
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Oldbased
> Than U
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Needs a crossover for the the final movie with the final Pacific Rim movie.
"To fight monsters we made monsters of our own"
Double release os PR3 and JW3 back to back. 4 hours of running, screaming, SJW and DInobots.
Make it so Hollywood. At this point what difference does it make.
Oldbased
> Than U
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Her pepperoni's are JUGE too. Some of the largest platters I've seen.hate the movie all you want, but godddddaaaaamn bryce dallas howard (ron howard's daughter no less) has some fine ass titties
Hosix
All labs matter!
- 4,737
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How about a Grimlock origin story that doesn’t suck? Then we get Grimlock wrecking shit and setting things on fire. Plus he can transform and hit things with his big mace.
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