Marriage and the Power of Divorce

moonarchia

moonarchia

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Drink more bourbon and tell us with nudity? Or not.

Springbok is probably more correct than a_skeleton_03. Simpler and more honest to acknowledge biology's influence than to play weird games to avoid being alone with people you secretly fear molesting or whatever that's all about.
 
lurkingdirk

lurkingdirk

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Khane said:
Yea, people talk and it's easier to just say fuck it than deal with possible misconceptions. But when "I don't spend time alone with other women" is preceded by "I like to tell my wife's friends to put on a bikini and take a bath with me"... well... then you just sound like a creep.
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Okay, fair point. Let me rephrase for myself.

I have great relationships with many people of the opposite sex. And while I enjoy those relationships, and have no trouble being entirely open with them to my wife, I do not go out for drinks with another woman alone, or get coffee with another woman alone. I will meet them if my wife comes with me. This prevents a lot of possible bother for no reason. I'm not avoiding things, I'm pro-actively maintaining healthy boundaries that uphold my marriage commitments as well as my commitments to my friends.
 
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A

a_skeleton_03

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moonarchia said:
Drink more bourbon and tell us with nudity? Or not.

Springbok is probably more correct than a_skeleton_03. Simpler and more honest to acknowledge biology's influence than to play weird games to avoid being alone with people you secretly fear molesting or whatever that's all about.
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There are no weird games necessary. I just don’t hang out alone with women ...

It really just happens natively with no effort. We aren’t talking about me walking out of the room with my hands on my head shouting “I touched nothing”.
 
Namon

Namon

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I have a receptionist at work that I have bonded with because our senses of humor and tastes are almost cosmically aligned. We became friends on facebook and give each other shit on posts and what not. Wife got bothered about it, so I kiboshed most of it. I didn't stop talking to her or anything, or became rude. I just stopped with the facebook stuff and don't go out of my way to shoot the shit. End of the day if something appears bad to the woman I vowed to stay with, then nothing else really matters. I am a firm believer of you don't shit where you eat, nor do you fuck where you work, so I was fine, but I got my wife's feelings, because mainly straight people are hard wired to have some sort of sexual tension towards the opposite sex. I mean our primary objective is to continue the species sooo, I say it'd be hard to NOT have some kind of attraction from at least one of the parties involved if not both. So, to not take a chance, I just chilled it out.
 
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Namon

Namon

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Never. LOL at best this would be a one night stand fuck if there was no risk of life ruining consequences. We get the same jokes and laugh at the same shit, and that's about it. She's complete redneck and someone who can't even use the word "seen" properly so she'd be one that I'd want to strangle inside of a couple hours.
 
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Noodleface

Noodleface

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I often think about that stuff. Like if some woman offered a one night stand NSA with 0 risk of std or pregnancy or of my wife finding out what would I do?

I like to think I wouldn't, but penis
 
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Mrs. Gravy

Mrs. Gravy

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Namon said:
Never. LOL at best this would be a one night stand fuck if there was no risk of life ruining consequences. We get the same jokes and laugh at the same shit, and that's about it. She's complete redneck and someone who can't even use the word "seen" properly so she'd be one that I'd want to strangle inside of a couple hours.
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Seen - my sister does not use it properly. I will restate to her what she has said in an attempt to alter, through modeling, her language use but it has not worked yet. I adore her so it is difficult for me to not just come out and yell, "It is: we saw, not: we seen!"
That would be a deal breaker for me as well. The dude who did not know what the word 'autonomy' meant - especially as I used in a clear context - got kicked to the curb.
Fortunately, Steady has an extensive vocabulary and can speak and write very well. Whew, because he ain't so bad in the bedroom either.

(P.S. I am aware that, sometimes in my posting, I will have typos or failure to use proper punctuation. I blame it on the use of my phone keyboard, ill-placed fingertips, haste, or lack of fucks to give.)


Edit to add reply to Noodleface Noodleface - I am guessing that you wouldn't, even: penis - because sex starts in your head and although your dick may be hard with which to begin, one thought of your wife and babies would probably make it melt. You are a good egg and your wife knew it when she said "yes".
 
Noodleface

Noodleface

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Don't apologize for grammar here. I imagine most people are shitposting quite literally.

It's tough to say. You don't have a penis but once it gets excited enough basically lizard brain takes over.
 
McCheese

McCheese

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Mrs. Gravy said:
Seen - my sister does not use it properly. I will restate to her what she has said in an attempt to alter, through modeling, her language use but it has not worked yet. I adore her so it is difficult for me to not just come out and yell, "It is: we saw, not: we seen!"
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Modeling language mistakes only works if the speaker actually notices the mistake. Generally, modeling (i.e., recasting the language mistake using the correct form) has one of the lowest success rates for correcting the error, because the speaker simply doesn't even realize an error has been made. People don't pay much attention to their language when speaking, so they just gloss over your model and continue with the discussion.

One of the more successful ways to correct oral language is to use repetition with emphasis. For example, if she says "We seen a movie last night." Instead of saying, "You saw a movie last night?" try saying "You SEEN a movie last night?" with a very heavy emphasis on the incorrect word to point out that there is something wrong with it.

She'll probably just think you're an idiot who doesn't understand her at first, but if you keep doing it she'll eventually pick up on the fact that there is something wrong about that word she keeps using.
 
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Namon

Namon

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I dunno about all of that, I just know I'd rather someone scrape their nails on a blackboard over saying "We seen the whole thing right up close yonder." Fuck. That. Noise. Huge pet peeve of mine.
 
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Cad

Cad

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Noodleface said:
I often think about that stuff. Like if some woman offered a one night stand NSA with 0 risk of std or pregnancy or of my wife finding out what would I do?

I like to think I wouldn't, but penis
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I dunno maybe I'm a closet faggot but I don't really desire NSA 1 night stand sex at all. I'm pretty sure if my wife suddenly was abducted by aliens that I'd find another long term steady very quickly. People are annoying and finding one that doesn't annoy you is important.
 
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Namon

Namon

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Noodleface said:
I often think about that stuff. Like if some woman offered a one night stand NSA with 0 risk of std or pregnancy or of my wife finding out what would I do?

I like to think I wouldn't, but penis
Click to expand...

I mean if all of those were in place? Sure I'd plow the hell out of this woman, but since that is akin to saying you'd have Santa Clause film the act as well, it's one I never really seriously entertain. Besides even if I never got caught, I'd still *know*. Whole line of thinking would change if the wife was *ok* with it though, but she's not, so there you go.
 
Mrs. Gravy

Mrs. Gravy

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I think that there are strings even if stated NSA. Some may be external if in fact the participants had hidden agendas, but mostly internal. One would have to be very good at compartmentalizing their act to not have some emotional tie with regard to the fidelity pledged to their partner.
I am no saint and often imagine sex with others - I am breathing for god's sake, but I desire to please my partner. I agreed to be true to him. I also have a track record of maintaining my integrity in areas of love and sex so, gonna keep that trait.

If it goes south, I may go and bang out a few randoms though. (Crosses fingers it doesn't go south, randoms can be crazy as fuck.)
 
Khane

Khane

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Cad said:
I dunno maybe I'm a closet faggot but I don't really desire NSA 1 night stand sex at all. I'm pretty sure if my wife suddenly was abducted by aliens that I'd find another long term steady very quickly. People are annoying and finding one that doesn't annoy you is important.
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You and I disagree about a lot of things but one thing we don't usually disagree on in the importance of financial stability and needing a woman who has her own ambitions and is successful. At our age this is incredibly difficult to find because they are either way younger than us and we have nothing really in common with them, or they are already taken.

There are women at this age who are successful and available but they are like me. Meaning independent, not very into traditional relationships, and not interested in someone who has children.
 
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Cad

Cad

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Mrs. Gravy said:
I think that there are strings even if stated NSA. Some may be external if in fact the participants had hidden agendas, but mostly internal. One would have to be very good at compartmentalizing their act to not have some emotional tie with regard to the fidelity pledged to their partner.
I am no saint and often imagine sex with others - I am breathing for god's sake, but I desire to please my partner. I agreed to be true to him. I also have a track record of maintaining my integrity in areas of love and sex so, gonna keep that trait.

If it goes south, I may go and bang out a few randoms though. (Crosses fingers it doesn't go south, randoms can be crazy as fuck.)
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Serious question though, what is it about a "new person" that makes them better than the person you're with that makes thinking/fantasizing about sex with others desirable?
 
Cad

Cad

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Khane said:
You and I disagree about a lot of things but one thing we don't usually disagree on in the importance of financial stability and needing a woman who has her own ambitions and is successful. At our age this is incredibly difficult to find because they are either way younger than us and we have nothing really in common with them, or they are already taken.

There are women at this age who are successful and available but they are like me. Meaning independent, not very into traditional relationships, and not interested in someone who has children.
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Agreed with everything here, I'd just say I'd differentiate between a 1 night stand/NSA and having a FWB that you've seen 100 times but it's not a serious relationship. At our age I think it'd be difficult to find "the one", for sure.
 
Noodleface

Noodleface

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Cad said:
I dunno maybe I'm a closet faggot but I don't really desire NSA 1 night stand sex at all. I'm pretty sure if my wife suddenly was abducted by aliens that I'd find another long term steady very quickly. People are annoying and finding one that doesn't annoy you is important.
Click to expand...

I don't think it means you're gay, I just fantasize about banging one out with a slut from time to time. Sex with my wife is much different even if she can be a slut when she wants
 
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