Solo: A Star Wars Story (2018)

it would have been fantastic in Solo if they kept all the elements but Han shoots the rebel leader and stares directly at the camera and says "what can I say, I just learned its always better to shoot first" and Chewie laughs hard and walks off with the money and holo-calls Khaleesi for a booty call, saying "Hey yo I'm worth $60 billion spacebux lets go smoke some death sticks and fuck shit up. I heard there's a bearded guy on Tatooine who knows where the Jedi treasure vault is"

then Solo 2 could have been about Khaleesi fucking him over and leaving him to die as a prisoner of Jabba who lets Han work off his debt by being a dancer and sex toy for all the Gamorreans

I read ridiculous FoH fanfic all the time, but now I can at least say "You have a future at Disney!" with a straight face.

Screamfeeder said:

You telling me that The Hero Journey ISN'T a profitable story structure to persue and while being the basis for literally every single adventure/sci-fi/fantasy movie ever it will be a failure? Man I forgot just how hardcore you internet guys can be.

Next you're going to go all @jayrebb and tell me Solo lost money.

Total Lifetime Grosses
Domestic: $197,203,695 57.3%
Foreign $147,102,828 42.7%
Worldwide: $344,306,523

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The Hero's Journey is old and busted. I want a gripping documentary about the plight of the Tusken Raiders. Jobs and Water Stolen by immigrant water farmers while constantly being hunted for sport by the cruel Jedi. This stunning, brave and oppressed peoples have long suffered under the barbaric treatment of their neighbors.

Hoss said:

Dammit. Boba and OB1 were 2 of the stories I was most looking forward to seeing in a movie.

Maybe I should take solace that this means they won't fuck up either of those characters.

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Yeah. That’s the point it’s their way of saying they’re punishing you for not supporting all of their bullshit. Of course they’re going to make the Boba and Obi film. They’ll probably make Solo 2-19. Just not immediately.

But for now they’re chastising you the same way Lucas did after ep 3. Fuck you for having bad taste sounds better than we keep serving you shit hoping you’ll smile and say yummm.

Screamfeeder said:

Or...it's bullshit.

Read the original article that spawned all that nonsense. In no place does Collider say that Star Wars Story movies were put on hold because of Solo.

It's fucking nerd hysteria.

"other major film-gossip outlets—including Variety, The Hollywood Reporter, and Deadline—have not published similar news as of press time."

For the record, myself and just about every other person I work with uses Deadline for actual movie/TV news. Notice how there is nothing there about it...

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Ars Technica spreading fake news? Imagine my shock

Hoss said:

You don't know what you're talking about. I loved solo. I went to see it multiple times.

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Maybe they’ll make you a special #1 fan card? I dunno. You’re pretty retarded for liking this train robbery movie.

In any event they’ll hope folks like you cry enough to the other 99% to bring some hype back to Star Wars. And hyperspace.

The main problem that KK and her SJU writers have with the Fett and Obi Wan movies is that they'd be centered on male characters.

Misogynist!!!

Get ready for an Aunt Beru feature. We learn where she got her recipe for the blue milk . . ?

Screamfeeder said:

What the fuck is wrong with a train robbery movie? Ever heard of The Wild Bunch? Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid?

Robbing trains is straight up Solo territory.

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absolutely nothing wrong with a good train robbery film. i know that an opinion that isn't overladen with hyperbole doesn't do too well on these boards lately, but bottom line? solo was a decent movie. it had some serious problems that stopped it from being a GOOD movie, but it wasn't terrible either.

the movie should have started with solo trying to get into the imperial navy and spent WAAAY more time doing that. but i get the impression that khaleesi was given WAY more story just because she's well known. her character didn't need to show up until he sees her in the bar. have it be the exact same character, just have han talk about her a bunch while he's in the navy. have him carry around a picture of her so we know who she is, but the whole imperial navy stuff went by SO quick that it was hard to even understand what was actually happening. "sign up for the imperial navy, do your part! once you've signed up just walk through this doorway to begin the trench warfare part of your service!"

as far as the obi-wan and fett movies go... could go up in the air... the MCU has had a couple lower income movies come out and it didn't derail anything there... then you have the DCEU that can't get more than a few films off the ground before they start canceling stuff... solo still made money. barely any, but some. i could see disney re-evaluating how QUICKLY they put films out for the star wars universe just to adjust some things here and there, but we all know they aren't done cashing in on SW yet.