PS5 was harder because it dropped kinda in a surprise way, first walmart dropped ~2 hours after the PS5 conference which implied preorders wouldn't start till the next day, then other sites started dropping PS5s in random intervals, and then of course Sony sent out direct PS5 links to "select" customers and it was very much a "are you favored or not?" situation. Plus it didn't help that they only sold 1 PS5-Digital for every 5 PS5 so there was a big imbalance in hardware that is functionally equivalent.
Xbox on the other hand gave very clear indications preorders wouldn't start until 8am PDT today, and everyone honored that - microsoftstore went live at exactly 759am and the site got crippled by the traffic but it was up for at least 2-3 hours and letting people preorder, you just got a lot of errors. Walmart, Target, and Amazon went up a bit randomly but were sold out in minutes. Gamestop in store was a joke, 6-12 consoles total for an 8am PDT sale time and their website was trash.
I'm pretty sure at least 50% of the purchases are scalpers and I think resell is gonna be weak on the xbox, there isn't that much brand loyalty to the Xbox, there is literally nothing this holiday that requires an SEX to play, the S is a weak baby console that is around the levels of a One X. I bet you'll see a ton of people cancel their orders as sales start flooding offerup, mercari, etc and everyone rushes to undercut each other.
PS5 and 3080 should continue to have strong demand though, while there isn't a whole lot PS5-only this holiday either there is at least Demon Souls and sorta Miles Morales and those are pretty big exclusives. Plus sony fans seem a bit more enthusiastic.
Best thing is to join a few discord groups that are hunting for consoles like Deals Supply and follow closely things like wario64s twitter account, especially if you know a console restock is happening. And restocks will definitely happen between now and launch.
you aren't alone in the frustration though, lol