Whats rustling your jimmies?

So it's not just me then.

oklahoma rustles my jimmies every damn day the winners of an ancient war got mordor the losers got oklahoma fuck my life counting the days sometimes hours till i can pcs away from this skid mark on the white speedo of america

Hoss_sl said:

pcs?

You use too many TLAs

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PCS = permanent change of station. Fancy way of saying changing bases.

I know we already discussed HOAs. But holy shit fuck, why do all the condos want like 500/mo for a HOA fee? Am I getting a steak dinner and a beej every night with that?

you know you live in the hood when on your way out the door to a 12 step meeting at 6 am , the wife says you got enough ammo honey ??

Mr208_sl said:

I know we already discussed HOAs. But holy shit fuck, why do all the condos want like 500/mo for a HOA fee? Am I getting a steak dinner and a beej every night with that?

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As a Board President....there's:

Management company fees
Insurance
County required inspections = cost to certify and maintain elevators, all firefighting, etc
Repair, repairs, and repairs
reserve fund based on an engineering company's study
More repairs
Gotta pay for that study
Gotta also pay to file taxes
Gotta then pay for your yearly audit
Retainer for your legal counsel
Cost for any legal cost above retainer
Amenities: such as pool contract, gym equipment, community room, sports facilities, etc
Landscaping. Fuck the cost of landscaping
snow removal. Fuck the cost of shoveling snow
24 hour attendant? Thats 200k a year.
Security? Salaries. Just cameras? Need to pay for that too.
Elevators need to have a phone line. 6 elevators and thats 6 phone lines you are paying for.
Pay for the alarm monitoring service as well.
Utilities. Electricity minimum for common areas. Water for common and often for whole building. Gas maybe.
Basic consumables. Paper towels. Soap. Light bulbs.
Shit breaks. More repairs
Janitorial contracts. Preventive maintenance contracts.
Exterior parking? Lines and curb need yearly painting
Garage? Fuck even worse.

If you are in a city look use this simple equation. 50 cent per square feet.

The cost is not just managing the day to day ops of the condo. It's there to maintain at the very least your value. You can sure slack and not repair shit and reduce the quality of what your building offers. But you lose it when you sell. Period. People bitch when they get a 2000 dollar assessment to repair 200 doors, 600 windows, roof repairs and redo the entirety of the roads and paint. But that 2000 either made your place go up by 5k or regained the 5k you would have otherwise been in the hole house value wise. When you go sell you dont want to walk up seeing a shitty parking lot, lights out, and dead trees. You dont want them to walk in a lobby that smells like old people, carpet that is torn up, and paint chipping off the wall. Curb appeal still matters with a condo.

TLDR - all this shit costs money.

I was under the impression that like >50% of HoA/condo fees went towards paying for water.

I wish. Maybe in California Water is 5% of our budget. There are two main reasons why you buy into a condo: convenience and amenities. Other reasons may include location (often in urban or trendy areas), price, and wanting to live in a community. But mostly you are paying every month to ensure shit is taken care of for you outside your door.

Chesire_sl said:

oklahoma rustles my jimmies every damn day the winners of an ancient war got mordor the losers got oklahoma fuck my life counting the days sometimes hours till i can pcs away from this skid mark on the white speedo of america

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Bro. I'm in motherfucking North Dakota. DOS is November 2017

Brikker_sl said:

Bro. I'm in motherfucking North Dakota. DOS is November 2017

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Hey I live in ND it could be worse.

Brikker_sl said:

Bro. I'm in motherfucking North Dakota. DOS is November 2017

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hahahahaha you're at Minot

Fadaar_sl said:

hahahahaha you're at Minot

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I thought he was from Grand Forks. I live in Minot though!

Oh hell I didn't even realize there were two AF bases up there, I've only ever known of Minot.

Oxygenated Water. There should be laws against shit like that.

I turn left onto a one way street and about 20 feet after I complete my turn, the car in front of me comes to an abrupt stop. I wait a couple seconds and honk my horn. Nothing. I wait for oncoming traffic to clear and go around the stopped vehicle and as I'm looking at them I realize the driver had stopped in the middle of the road, completely blocking traffic during rush hour, in order to take a picture of the sun rising.