Alien: Covenant (2017)

i thought covenant was a better film than Prometheus.

I wasn't a fan of how the little white babies (neomorphs? whateverTF they are...) grew to adult size in about 2 minutes. The one jets across the field small and a minute later is running back as an adult.

Watching these films my head fills up with a parade of thoughts that mostly all boil down to "I don't understand why this character is doing what they are doing." I can't let it go and I end up not having all that great a time watching the film.

The space truckers in Alien and space marines in Aliens work so much better than what we get in these later entries in the franchise. The premise and characters are grounded. Hey space truckers, go check this shit out. If you don't you don't get a cut of the haul. The audience can identify with this easily. They go in with suits on, one gets attacked by an unknown organism, the safety procedures are overridden by one of the crew, and shit goes crazy. No one is required to be retarded or make nonsensical decisions. The best parts of Covenant are when David shows up but before the final action sequence and most of it is talking. That's where all the sci-fi meat of the story is. I want more of that and less gigantic action sequences.

Some of the technology seems fitting for 100 years in the future, but using the same guns and fucking plastic syringes in 2104? The fuck.

The entire sequence with the classic xenomorph and the girl on the crane was just so fucking bad. Yeah, I get it, CGI makes it so you can have spaceships and aliens and a lady flying around all crazy and shit, but it was actually boring to watch. We've seen the same thing getting repeated in all of the sci-fi reboots where it has to be this insane over-the-top action sequence ontop of a moving spacecraft. Add in Kenny Powers doing a rehash of the 'cool pilot guy with a place as a name' and its somehow even worse.

Is everyone dead yet? That's all I want. David to come back to earth with his uber hybrid and uplift humanity, kicking and screaming, into the next epoch.

Gonna watch this tonight.... i plan on getting hammered before hand.

There are very few movies that I'm genuinely upset I wasted my time downloading and watching them, but good fucking god I want my time/bandwidth back.

It gives Scream metrics apparently, so you made them many shekels and you weren't aware of it. It's actually worse than free.

You are now aware Ridley Scott didn't do anything good since American Gangster / Body Of Lies almost ten years ago and nowadays they're just letting him wander around movie sets during photo ops.

Holy shit this was fuck awful. It seriously took a lot of effort to get through that dog. I'm never letting my friend pick a movie again.

What's sad is this could have actually been good.

The best part about Prometheus was the beautiful photography and majestic sets and screenplay. They could have expanded on that to give the movie as well as the franchise new boundaries and possibilities by expanding on the exploration aspect of the narrative. The Engineers are actually quite interesting, it would have been pretty fucking cool to see their homeworld or other new/undiscovered entities in the galaxy.

Instead everything is interconnected, explosions, and David created xenomorphs. I remember joking about Prometheus and when this movie was announced people were confused why Rapace wasn't going to be in the movie. There were all kinds of theories as to why and it turn ed out that the worse one was actually true and now canon.

It's literally fanfic at this point.

I really liked Prometheus. The aesthetic was really good and I thought it opened the door for a lot of good possibilities. Covenant, while I didn't feel it was a total waste of time, definitely didn't do anything to advance the plot of the overall story and felt more like a side story if even that. It definitely ranks as the worst film in the franchise for me (including AVP stuff). The action was decent enough, the only scene I found completely awful was the people cartoon banana-peel slipping on blood trying to shoot the first alien. This movie's downfall is the plot as they try to make David this twisted evil genius when in reality he's just annoying and should've been left behind in Prometheus to never pop up again.

BTW, the whole David/Walter plot seems ripped right out of Star Trek TNG with Data and Lore.

I agree the best parts of this movie were the David scenes just talking and explaining what he's been doing on the planet all those years. More sci-fi stuff, less craptastic action scenes please...but wtf do I know I'm no Hollywood exec.