Marriage and the Power of Divorce

Hoss

Hoss

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TheNozz said:
I don't know if this is the thread for this, but I've been miserable for a long time now due to my inability to get any kind of relationship going for nearly 7 years.

No woman has been interested in me sexually for the last 2 years unless I pay them.
I went on a date in March that went nowhere, and before that, hadn't been able to set up a date since 2016.
I haven't been in a relationship since 2011.
No one has told me "I love you" since 2007.

I've spent most of my entire adult life by myself while my parents had been in multiple marriages with multiple children by the time they were younger than me by 6 years.

There are times when I think about offing myself, but ultimately can't bring myself to do it because I'm too afraid of dying, NOT because I have anything to live for.
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I don't know if you wanted to vent or wanted help. But if you want help, I guarantee there are people here who can. We just need a lot more information.

First piece of advice is lose the stigma about paying for it. You always pay for it one way or another. I was downright scared of girls until my 30's. I got over it with a strict regimen of going to strip clubs and chatting up the hot naked bitches between dances.

Second is

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Big Phoenix

Big Phoenix

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Monumental attention whores screwing with you when you have gotten laid in almost a year is beyond jimmy rustling.

Girl at work(yeah dont shit where you eat...) for the past couple months has been extremely flirty with me and just generally very into me. To the point that when i asked a buddy at work about it, he said everyone in the office already thinks we are sleeping with each other. I finally ask her for her number a week ago. We text back and forth with a few times shes said some very sexually suggestive things to me out of the blue, without me trying to push the conversation that way at all.

So Friday night I send her text saying lets get something to eat saturday night and then try out *insert sexually suggestive text she sent me* a few days earlier afterwards. She doesnt respond that night but texts me saturday morning saying "cant today, have some errands I have to catch up on." Text back and fourth some more, again reference something else sexually she said earlier, no response after that.

Fucking immature people.
 
Dandai

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I think it's a mistake to dismiss her reaction as immature. It seems like you made the classic misstep of opening a conversation with a proposition. The problem with opening a conversation with a sexually suggestive message (as opposed to building up to it in an ongoing back-and-forth) is that you don't know what the person is/will be doing when they receive it. She may have been excited and gotten all hot and bothered by your advances if she were home and by herself, but if she got your text in the middle of a heated argument with her mom she's more likely to think, "I don't have time for this shit right now."
 
Big Phoenix

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Hmm it wasn't random, we were kind texting already. She said she was busy at home playing video games.
 
sakkath

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TheNozz said:
I don't know if this is the thread for this, but I've been miserable for a long time now due to my inability to get any kind of relationship going for nearly 7 years.
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Do you have hobbies? If you're miserable and lonely then women won't be in to that. Join some social sports, start going to community events, go to the pub with mates, watch the footy live every weekend, whatever kind of things you enjoy which are social. If you're having fun then women will want to be around you.
 
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pharmakos

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Big Phoenix said:
So Friday night I send her text saying lets get something to eat saturday night and then try out *insert sexually suggestive text she sent me* a few days earlier afterwards. She doesnt respond that night but texts me saturday morning saying "cant today, have some errands I have to catch up on." Text back and fourth some more, again reference something else sexually she said earlier, no response after that.

Fucking immature people.
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Some girls that are willing to say the words still get the heebie jeebies when they hear them.

When she spent weeks flirting without you advancing things, you didn't realize it, but you were playing hard to get.

Not sure where to go from here, tho. Maybe cold shoulder for a bit while maintaining friendliness.
 
Big Phoenix

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sakkath said:
Do you have hobbies? If you're miserable and lonely then women won't be in to that. Join some social sports, start going to community events, go to the pub with mates, watch the footy live every weekend, whatever kind of things you enjoy which are social. If you're having fun then women will want to be around you.
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Oh no I'm not annoyed about not getting laid or feeling lonely, its that I'm annoyed from just being lead on and being an ego boost for her.

I mean when a woman basically asks how big your dick is and says she wants to suck it, that means she's dtf right? Or am i off base here?
 
sakkath

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I was responding to someone else but yes she sounds like she's either dtf or is acting like someone who is dtf.
 
lurkingdirk

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Careful, here is how that conversation could go:

Her: Hey, how big is your dick, I wanna suck it.
Him: I have a pretty big dick, why don't you come over and suck it.
Her: I was just raped.
 
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Dalven

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TheNozz said:
I don't know if this is the thread for this, but I've been miserable for a long time now due to my inability to get any kind of relationship going for nearly 7 years.

No woman has been interested in me sexually for the last 2 years unless I pay them.
I went on a date in March that went nowhere, and before that, hadn't been able to set up a date since 2016.
I haven't been in a relationship since 2011.
No one has told me "I love you" since 2007.

I've spent most of my entire adult life by myself while my parents had been in multiple marriages with multiple children by the time they were younger than me by 6 years.

There are times when I think about offing myself, but ultimately can't bring myself to do it because I'm too afraid of dying, NOT because I have anything to live for.
Click to expand...

This is definitely the right place for this and the people who frequent this thread can and will help. I can testify to this after the rough patch I went through at the end of last year. As has been said we need to know a bit more about you first pal.

How old are you? What's your work situation like? How's your social life? What do you do to look for dates at the moment? How did you set up your date in March?

It might be a bit tough putting some of this information out there but internet bros will help, there's a wealth of experience here!
 
Dalven

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Big Phoenix said:
Monumental attention whores screwing with you when you have gotten laid in almost a year is beyond jimmy rustling.

Girl at work(yeah dont shit where you eat...) for the past couple months has been extremely flirty with me and just generally very into me. To the point that when i asked a buddy at work about it, he said everyone in the office already thinks we are sleeping with each other. I finally ask her for her number a week ago. We text back and forth with a few times shes said some very sexually suggestive things to me out of the blue, without me trying to push the conversation that way at all.

So Friday night I send her text saying lets get something to eat saturday night and then try out *insert sexually suggestive text she sent me* a few days earlier afterwards. She doesnt respond that night but texts me saturday morning saying "cant today, have some errands I have to catch up on." Text back and fourth some more, again reference something else sexually she said earlier, no response after that.

Fucking immature people.
Click to expand...

What age is this lassie conpared to you? You're in your late 20's/early 30s right? I've had a dozen or more of these situations with work colleagues over the years and they invariably end up the same way - outrageous amounts of flirting to the point where everyone thinks you are shagging anyway, then when you ultimately try and make something happen by asking them out they would get weird. I always solved it by getting hammered with them on impromptu work social occasions and kiss/sleep with them and take it from there.

Ultimately who knows how women work, just cool of it a bit and see how she reacts as fuck knows what neurosis is making her act like that. Give it a week and ask her out again in the middle of an exchange, if it doesn't pan out from there just back off and leave her til her crazy.
 
Phazael

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Cad said:
I do not agree with this, if someone raises their hands to you or hits you with an object they should consider that action before they do it. Being the weaker sex does not give them a pass to be physically abusive. If a bitch wants to raise hands to me she is an adult and is free to do so but should consider the consequences.

Stop infantilizing women. They know EXACTLY what they are doing.
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Youare a lawyer. What happens when he retaliates in that situation? Legaly and in court.
 
Noodleface

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You'd have to prove that you defended yourself in self defense and you did not use excessive force. The last part would be tough to prove.
 
alavaz

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I don't think he was saying it's ok to go ahead and drop her with a haymaker, just that the attitude of "women are weak, NEVER EVER hit them," is bullshit.
 
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Lendarios

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Phazael said:
Youare a lawyer. What happens when he retaliates in that situation? Legaly and in court.
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We talked over and we are working things out. I told her that if it ever happens again i would choose to walked out, she said she will not do it again.

I do wanted to point out that this wasn't the first/second time, on the past I just walked out of the situation, but is not a nice feeling let me tell you being on the receiving end.
 
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Adebisi

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I'm too exhausted to pursue or mess with that.

I need a Basic Becky
 
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Janx

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Grats Adebisi Adebisi , god speed on the tinder world.

Things with the wife are bad, we had a major argument the other day that started because I am going to take the day off for the release of PoP.

She had asked me to take 1 day off to help her ( she was going to stay all day with her mom in a minor hospital operation) so I said sure, then last Saturday I told her that I would take 2 days, 1 for her and 1 for me.

She then asked to take on my day off and do some of her house chores, I told her, then that If i did that, then it wouldn't be a day off. We started arguing about our schedules, basically mine is from 7 AM to 7 PM out the house driving to and from work. Her schedule is a hectic combination of school and driving our daughter to speech therapies. At some point I told her she just had a whole week off, (she didn't she had some days off from spring break and her nursing school, she had 3 days off).

She enrages and throws her notebook at me, full on 5 feet away full speed throw, it hits me on the stomach, (not the first she hits me in an argument, kind of the third). So instead of walking away , like I did on previous occasions, I go at her and put the fear of god in her. I said that I would hit her if she continues to hit me/throwing stuff at me during our arguments, and I did meant it. I have been angry at her before, when it is basically a shouting match, over other arguments; but this time it was a different kind of anger, I didn't even raise my voice to speak .


I didn't touch her, but I'm sure i made my point across.

Now she claims that she is afraid of me, but somehow has not put two and two together and realize that my action was a reaction to her becoming physically aggressive, again . And of course will not admit that she is at fault and blames her throwing stuff at me because of the words I said.

I now stay work late, go home, interact little with her, pay EQ, sleep on the couch.
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This is the kind of shit my wife did + always accused me of cheating when I've been 100% faithful for 21 years. Got so bad we seperated for about a month when I gave up and decided to give it another try. Went good for a few months then right back to the same shit. Stopped sleeping in the same room and cut out sex. Every time she brings it up I tell her shes getting just as much sex as my imaginary girlfriends.
 
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