My first Blog entry.
The Captain’s Blog
Dead Toe Society
Journal Entry #1
Stillness is not a good sign at sea. In fact, the sudden stillness and the thump that nearly knocked me off my feet were distressing. As Captain of, The Dead Toe, Captain Bart to be specific, I couldn’t afford to ignore the disturbance. I’ve been dead a long time and learned that ignoring issues might not re-kill me, but it sure can complicate things!
As such, I dropped my controller and paused my game. My parrot, Bermuda, mid molt with feathers sticking off of him like he was imitating a porcupine, joined me on my way out,
chanting “All is lost!”
That was fine. When he started screeching to abandon ship, things got hairy. I popped out onto the deck.
My crew hadn’t noticed anything but sat at a table each with headphones on and Mer-mama had her tail up on the table as well despite RGB, the squid, and his repeated comment that she smelled like week-old fish.
Ah, nothing could be too wrong if they were this relaxed.
“Ahoy, me hearties!” I called out, letting my tobacco-filled pipe bob on my bony jaw—lack of lips made smoking effectively hard but the smoke pouring out between my teeth intimidated plenty of land lovers!
No one glanced up from their game and again I noticed the odd stillness. We should be swaying with the water and making our way across the waves. I looked to the left…looked to the right. There are times in life when seeing water surrounding you is a problem, but when you are supposed to be in the middle of the ocean, that watery grave is a luxury we often take for granted.
No water this time. Sand, golden and bright.
“Have we run aground?!”
The blasted parrot is the only one to answer. “Sailing while gaming! Sailing while gaming!”
RGB hits Mer-Mama’s shoulder and then stands up. He’s currently a deep blue color that really suits his tentacles, though as his name implies, he often runs the color spectrum.
Mer-Mama tosses her tail off the table and with the most put-upon expression she can manage she chirps into her headset “Wait, something’s happening IRL. Gotta goes.”
Don’t know where she got the idea that fish women were supposed to sing but she’s always halfway broken into a song.
She joined me, Parrot, and RGB.
“Mateys!” I greeted them trying to keep myself and them in good cheer. I hold out my bone arms and drape one around RGB. My good humor doesn’t last long when I’m reminded of the state of the ship. There are times when a day on the beach to relax would be ideal… mostly right after I’ve pirated an unreleased game or some other treasure for my crew… but we have places to be. “It appears we be stuck on a reef.”
RGB turns back to the crew. Sea monsters and undead sailors make for great gaming teams, but they do tend to be lax about sailing.
“Okay, who was supposed to be at the helm?” RGB yells. His face has gone a purple-red that is starting to spread down his tentacles.
The crew mumbled indecipherably, huddled around a flat screen clasping their controllers. The game is close and any effort to distract them further might cause more damage than good. You know how it goes, the sailors will demand a rematch and the sea monsters will try to drown them and then… well it gets messy and wet. And the ship running ashore is already messing with my schedule. Sometimes I think I ought to get a crew that’s interested in sailing…
“Don't know why you expect anything of them. New game and all. What exactly was in that locked chest the crew brought back?” The sparkle in her deep blue eyes tells me she’d like to get in on the action, and her nearness tells me that RGB wasn’t kidding about the fishy smell. “I’ve never seen that game!”
The parrot screeched in answer, “Hogwarts Legacy Beta.”
No choice for it then. I know my crew’s priorities. “Well, I suppose we’ll just wait on the tide.”
“How long’s that gonna take?” Mer-Mama sang before falling into a talking voice. “I’ve got COD at 7.”
I look at my watch. It’s just past six. “And a podcast episode at 8.”
“Another one?!” RGB sounds annoyed.
“Aye, another one!” I snap. We may play games for a living but it’s not like our life is a game! “You know we bring the listeners a new show every Wednesday at 8.”
“Wednesdays at 8,” Parrot squawks. At least someone understands keeping to a schedule.
“Oh, yeah. Where we give them all the tea on everything happening in the gaming world. News, reviews, release dates, who’s playing what—"
Mer-Mama slammed her shoulder into his sternum and belted out the next part. Sometimes I think she honestly believes she’s on a stage. “And in-depth discussions of our favorite RPGs, console games, and tabletop games.”
I cut in before she finishes her high note. “Aye, we do. With new topics and special guests every week! Not even a shipwreck will make us miss one! So, get your tails in gear!”
Parrot squawks and flaps his wing with excitement. “Live show! Live show!
A live show would have been just perfect, but… as I said in the beginning, stillness is a bad sign. Until we get the ship moving again, I haven’t got squat to do but plan out all the future games we’ll play for our subscribers. “In the meantime, we’ll be here just…waiting for the tide to rise.
RGB perks up “Or waiting for the crew to help.”
A glance at the crew tells me RGB has been out of the water too long. The crew is still huddled around the flat screen clasping their controllers. They turn to look at us, decide we don’t have food, booze, or a new game, and then abruptly turn back to their game.
I grin. Sometimes Life imitates art. “Like waiting on Pantheon: The Rise of the Fallen.”
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