Thunderbolts* (2025)

Sevens

Log Wizard
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22,377
Ok but why?

Why does anyone give a shit about the avengers? Who even makes up the fucking team now? The only thing we even know is rdj is coming back to play dr doom which is ultra fucking retarded on its face.

Its all the shitty temp off brand slop characters that can't even sell tickets for their solo movies why the fuck do you care about the team up?

Seriously, name the current avengers line up?

1. Captain African american
2. ?
3. ?
4. ?

We can assume i guess that the fantastic 4 are gonna time and universe jump into modern MCU cus Dr doom is so I guess they are gonna be in it? Avengers 5 is basically just a fantastic 4 sequel featuring captain gay black man.

Or maybe the * on thunderbolts is that they are actually the new fucking avengers team. Everything else has bombed there is no popular heros left for a team up so the suicide squad rip off team of half baked "misunderstood" villains are now the new fucking avengers.
I thought they had said the * actually stood for
*Avengers not available


Googled it and yeah
Well, at the bottom of the poster, we see that the asterisk in Thunderbolts* points to the words “*The Avengers Are Not Available.” In fact, in case we have any doubt, the official post copy from Marvel Studios actually asks, “What is the hidden meaning behind the asterisk in the title?” and replies with “The Avengers ...


Not.jpg
 
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Lanx

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anyone involved with comics knows that this is exactly how marvel went tits up in the 90s. i mean now they have the bank of the mouse, but in the 90s retards bought all kinds of marvel comics and marvel crammed out as many "new vol #1", extra ultra foil edition, hey how about this new term "variant cover"

and now theyre in a desperate place, shoving down any and all their properties hoping for the next avengers or gotg
 

Bald Brah

Trakanon Raider
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I highly doubt Loki brought in a lot of revenue. That and Wandavision were completely unwatchable for me and I'm pretty sure as a life long comics fan I am in the target audience.

And I made it through most of Obi-wan which was god awful.
 
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Aldarion

Egg Nazi
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Except of course they had to make Loki bi-sexual, and he also plays second fiddle to (you guessed it) a Female Loki.
It was one throwaway line, consistent with canon, and he spent the entire first season having a romance with a woman (who was, yes, a female Loki but its still a male-female relationship)

I hate the gaying as much as the raceswapping but this one didnt bother me even 1/10th as much as Kang
 
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Void

BAU BAU
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Loki turned into a mare so that he could get pounded by some stallion and give birth to Sleipnir, Odin's 8-legged horse. He also fathered Fenrir the giant wolf and Jormungandr the world serpent. So, just let your imaginations wander as to who those mothers might have been. Loki fucks everything.

Honestly, Loki fucking an opposite sex version of himself is pretty much the most Loki thing he could do.

That being said, the first series was ok for me, but it didn't impress me enough to even bother watching the next season. I wasn't annoyed about him boning himself, I was more annoyed that the TVA was apparently mostly run by angry black women that were objectively terrible at pretty much everything.

Hawkeye is still the best D+ series. Except it had that dumb deaf cunt Echo in it.
 
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Gavinmad

Mr. Poopybutthole
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I hate the post-Endgame MCU as much as anyone, more than most, and while I remember being pretty critical at the time I think Loki S1 was actually pretty decent. I didn't care enough about any of this shit anymore to watch S2 but I know how it ends and it sounds like a pretty great send-off for Hiddleston.

Nothing compares to Hawkeye though, even if it did have that dumb deaf cunt Echo in it.
 
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Mahes

Bronze Baronet of the Realm
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I hate the post-Endgame MCU as much as anyone, more than most, and while I remember being pretty critical at the time I think Loki S1 was actually pretty decent. I didn't care enough about any of this shit anymore to watch S2 but I know how it ends and it sounds like a pretty great send-off for Hiddleston.

Nothing compares to Hawkeye though, even if it did have that dumb deaf cunt Echo in it.
Still one of the best one on one dialogues in the Marvel Universe..



 
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Zweischneid

Potato del Grande
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Both Thor and Loki and even Odin frequently went into women's clothes.

Hard to tell the tone though in retrospect. Was it less bothering with rigid sexuality restrictions than later Christianity or was it just Bugs Bunny going drag to troll Elmer Fudd-type of humor?
 

Chukzombi

Millie's Staff Member
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Except of course they had to make Loki bi-sexual, and he also plays second fiddle to (you guessed it) a Female Loki.
See, I agree with both those points, but I love female Loki and thought she was a great addition and comic foil to the story. That show was absolutely awesome. Season 2 was weak, but It still has some very good moments. I can watch it again and wouldn't mind .
 

Sevens

Log Wizard
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See, I agree with both those points, but I love female Loki and thought she was a great addition and comic foil to the story. That show was absolutely awesome. Season 2 was weak, but It still has some very good moments. I can watch it again and wouldn't mind .
The fact that they had a female Loki isn't the problem, in a "all things are possible" multiverse a female Loki is guaranteed...the fact that they made Loki a bumbling fool playing second string to girl boss female Loki is the problem. Look at the Hawkeye series, They brought in what will be the new female Hawkeye...but in no way did they make Hawkeye less than just to make her great. She was a hardcore fangirl for Hawkeye and it played out in the show...she was also kind of a wreck.
 

BoozeCube

The Wokest
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This is just utter shit. Yet another Marvel movie I won't ever be seeing.

So...

The Marvels
Eternals
Kraven
Fagli Chow and the 10 bracelets
Copetain Anti-America
Love and Blunder
Quantumania
All of the D+ series
Wakanda forever

And now Thunderbolts

Disney is on a fucking roll.

They ruined StarWars as well.
 

Chukzombi

Millie's Staff Member
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215,918
The fact that they had a female Loki isn't the problem, in a "all things are possible" multiverse a female Loki is guaranteed...the fact that they made Loki a bumbling fool playing second string to girl boss female Loki is the problem. Look at the Hawkeye series, They brought in what will be the new female Hawkeye...but in no way did they make Hawkeye less than just to make her great. She was a hardcore fangirl for Hawkeye and it played out in the show...she was also kind of a wreck.
The the lady siff endless slapping was stupid. But it wasn't the entire show. Just like the infinity stones being just a drawer full of marbles at the TVA or that a bunch of sheboons were in charge of the universe. Considering what a shit show all of it was, that part made sense. There was lots of other great stuff in there. Most of all it had Loki doing Loki stuff
 

spronk

FPS noob
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THUNDERBOLTS__Payoff_Digital_1Sht_v2_Lg.jpg


i have a feeling taskmaster isn't in the movie very much

also 3 of those people have super soldier serum in them, "not super" my ass
 

Caliane

Avatar of War Slayer
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having Bob go crazy in the movie hes introduced seems like a bad choice. now, sure they used to be able to tell stories in 1 movie, and not require 3 movie deals to tell a story..
but there's just no way 1 movie can really get anyone to accept him as a regular, before the turn. 1 movie just makes him a 1 off villain of the week.

Also, who is he going to kill to sell the "oh fuck"? they don't have anyone. none of the super powerful side characters, ares, herc, etc have been properly established. soy hulk? thor? maybe.

Obviously they simply have to talk him down too. the contrivance they would need to do to fight him at all is silly.
which idk, even "killing his body" wouldn't actually kill him. so they might do that and have him just come back I guess.
 

Dr.Retarded

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THUNDERBOLTS__Payoff_Digital_1Sht_v2_Lg.jpg


i have a feeling taskmaster isn't in the movie very much

also 3 of those people have super soldier serum in them, "not super" my ass
Why is taskmaster a girl, he's a guy? I played him in Marvel Heroes and he was a dude. I really miss that game. Is still one of the most fun ARPGs ever.
Sorry I never saw whatever movie he was coming from the same with that TDS beard guy, and whoever the hell that girl is supposed to be.
 
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Xarpolis

Life's a Dream
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Task Master is some "big boss" version of Black Widow. But is somehow almost robotic in reacting to things, and mostly controlled by the armor. They just magiced her into a girl boss for reasons. I guess it kinda makes sense if she went through the same camp as the rest of the Widows.
 
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TheNozz

Bronze Baron of the Realm
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I hate how this is basically Suicide Squad with the name “Thunderbolts” slapped on it

the original Thunderbolts story in comics was great: a team of heroes shows up to defend the world after the other heroes died fighting Onslaught

but by the end of the first issue, it turns out they’re really the Masters of Evil in disguise, pretending to be heroes to earn the public’s trust and eventually betray them.

however, some of the team enjoy being heroes and this creates conflict

this should have been a series instead of a film, exploring these ideas but whatever
 
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